X5: Facing Death
by Rogue Hunter
Summary: A story dealing with the ending for X5 from the perspectives of the game's characters. Chapter 8 is up!
1. X

Disclaimer:  I don't own any of these Megaman X characters.

AN:  Here's the first chapter of my new fic.  It deals with the X5 ending from the perspectives of different characters in the game.

I am still working on Specter, I just need to finish hammering out some of the next chapter's details.

Since I'm back in college, I'm not sure how often I'll be able to update my stories.

This first Chapter is X's POV.

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**X5:  Facing Death**

**X**

            I've certainly had better days . . .

            In the last 24 hours a colony almost crashed into the planet, almost every reploid in the world has been infected by the Sigma virus, my best friend fell under suspicion of being Maverick, and I got into a battle with Zero, my aforementioned friend, that left us both almost too exhausted to fight Sigma.  Then after Sigma's new body blew up, I found Zero blown in half, I got shot in the back by a half-dead Sigma, and now I'm dying.  I've definitely had better days.

            I still can't believe how Sigma used Zero and me to spread the virus like that.  He lost to us on purpose, knowing that when he died the virus would spread all over the world.  The only consolation is that we kept the Eurasia colony from falling to Earth and killing everyone.  Sigma said the whole reason he went this far was to awaken Zero's true self . . . What did he mean by that?  Could my best friend, someone I've known and trusted for over 20 years, not be who I thought he was?  Is his true self a Maverick?  Is that why the new form of the Maverick virus has the same power readings as Zero?

            No . . . It has to be Sigma just playing with my mind.  Like that crack about a former ally of mine making him that insanely strong body and who hated me as much as he did . . . I don't know anyone who could make something like that.  Well, maybe Alia could, but she would never willingly help somebody like Sigma.

            What if Sigma was telling the truth about Zero though?  No, nobody is their true self once they've been infected by the virus.  It's like their very souls are warped by the virus and they become someone else entirely . . . at least that's what it did to Sigma . . .

            I suppose I should be thinking about how unfair it is that I'm dying.  Oddly enough even though I don't want to die, the fact that I am doesn't bother me.  I've had a good run.   Most reploids don't usually live to be 24; many lose their life in an uprising or get infected by the virus and are destroyed before they can live that long.   Hunters usually have a life expectancy of five to seven years; the fact that I've survived doing this job for over two decades is nothing short of phenomenal.

What does bother me is leaving behind my friends when they are about to face one of their most daunting tasks, rebuilding the planet.  My other regret is that I couldn't save Zero's life.  I could go to my grave a lot easier knowing he was still around to carry on the fight against Sigma and the Mavericks . . . as it is I must simply accept that in the end I couldn't even help my closest friend escape death the way he saved me years ago.  

So, if I've accepted that I'm going to die then why do I still desperately cling to life?  A few reasons come to mind.  First, I don't want to cause my friends to suffer anymore than they already have during this rebellion.  They've had to watch the planet come to the edge of oblivion and as well as have many of their comrades become enemies.  That's part of why I'm still holding on . . . in some vain hope that my friends can help me so that they won't have to lose another friend because of today's tragic events.  Another reason that I'm still clinging to life is that, somehow, I know Sigma will be back and I'm not sure if the Hunters can handle him without Zero or me around to fight.  There's also one other reason, aside from the fact I don't really want to die.  It's not so much a reason as it is a feeling that I've left something undone . . . that there is still something I must do, but I can't figure out what that is just now.

            I remember asking Zero once what felt like to die.  He simply said "Dying hurts like hell."  Well Zero, you were right, dying does really hurt.  I can't remember ever being in this much pain before . . .

            Zero . . . You must be in worse shape than me right now.  You were already dying when I found you and the shot that Sigma hit us with couldn't have helped your condition any.  You're my best friend and I couldn't save you.  I'm sorry we wound up fighting each other.  Maybe things would have been different if I had just tried a little harder to avoid a fight.  I just hope you understand that I was worried about you . . . I just wanted you to go back to the base and show everyone you weren't a Maverick, that Lifesavor's fears were unjustified.  Why didn't you trust me enough do that and to let me handle the rest of this on my own?  Zero, why were you so determined to not to go back to the base even if it meant fighting me?  Were you afraid of something?  You even accused me of being a Maverick before we fought.  Did really think that I was Maverick?

            Regardless of what happened here today Zero, I still consider you my best friend.  How could I not?  You've been like a brother to me and you even risked your life to protect me from Sigma today after our fight.  I hope that means you still consider me to be your friend.

            It's almost funny.  After taking so much damage my helmet's communicator still works.  I can hear everyone in the control room, but I'm too damaged and tired to send a reply . . .

            Signas my friend, I know you just took over as the Supreme Commander of the Hunters not that long ago but it looks like you'll have to hold things together without me and Zero there to help.  I know this will leave you in a bind, but nothing can be done about it.  It shouldn't be any problem for you though; you handled yourself pretty well considering this was the first major crisis to occur on your watch.  Most of the other commanders I've known would have needed a few more years of experience before being able to handle something like this.  You'll be fine.  I know the Hunters will survive and rebuild the Earth as long as your there.

            Douglas, take care.  Your skills are going to be needed more than ever soon.  Undoing the damage form the colony debris that's impacting the planet is no small task.  Not to mention you still need to repair the damage to the base caused by the virus.  At least you won't have to worry about me wrecking anymore of your landchasers.

            Since I can hear Alia better than the rest, the feed must be coming from her headset.  I've never heard her like this before.  She's pleading for me to respond, she sounds so desperate.  Now Alia's trying to get an emergency medical team teleported out here . . . I can hear Signas replying that they can't send anyone till this area is confirmed safe.  He's worried about any remaining Mavericks and that new virus that appeared here.  Alia's pissed now.  She's yelling at them to either send someone or she'll go by herself.  She sounds angry, but I can hear the fear lurking beneath the anger in her voice . . . the fear that it's already too late to help me and Zero, that she's about to lose two of her friends . . .

            Alia . . . You're one of the few people who understand and share my feelings about fighting.  I suppose that's part of the reason why we got along so well, we both wanted an end to this stupid war and to finally live in peace.  I know you've always been a little protective of me and how you worry about me when I go on a mission . . . it must really be hard to sometimes not be able to do more than sit and listen as your friends fight for their lives.  I'm sorry for the pain my death will put you and the others through.

            I guess I should have listened when you asked me not to come here, that you had a bad feeling about this place.  That should have been a warning right there.  You almost never make a judgment about a situation based solely on a feeling like you did today.  I know I told you that everything would be okay and that I'd be back with Zero in no time.  I'm sorry that I couldn't keep my promise.  Maybe you were right and I should have let Zero handle this place by himself.  I just hope you understand why I did what I did.  I couldn't just turn my back on Zero when he might have needed my help.

            Besides, I had to prove that Lifesavor was wrong about Zero being a Maverick.  The only way to do that was to try and bring Zero back.  If he had turned out to be a Maverick, then it would have been for the best that we fought here.  If we had waited and Lifesavor had been right, Zero could have attacked the base and put everyone in danger.  I couldn't risk that Allie.  That's why I had to go and see Zero for myself.  I thought that if he was okay then he would return to base and put everyone's fears to rest . . . I never imagined that he wouldn't willingly leave this place or that we would actually fight each other.

            I can feel myself slipping away . . . My vision is gone . . . My memory module is malfunctioning, picking and showing memories at random . . . My communicator just went dead . . . or did my audio sensors go offline?  It doesn't matter . . . The last of my power is fading fast . . . I guess this is it then . . .

            _Not yet . . . _

            What was that?!  Who are you?! What do you want?!

            _Actually, I want you to rest and relax for now . . . Hold on, X . . . Just for a few more moments__._

            Wait!  Who are you?!

            _Calm down X.  Everything is going to be okay, I just need you to go to sleep for a moment.  You'll feel better when you wake up, I promise._

            That voice . . . it's so familiar . . . it can't be . . .

            _I'm sorry this had to be your path in life my son.  Please let me help you, it's the least I can do._

            Okay.  I'll let you help me . . . Thank you, father . . .

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Please read and review.


	2. Zero

AN:  Thanks to everyone who has reviewed my story.  I really appreciate it.  Here's the next chapter of X5:  Facing Death.  It's Zero's POV this time.

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**Zero**

            "I'm sorry, X . . . But . . . I think . . . I have to die . . . to restore the peace . . ."

            Well that's not going to be a problem.  I'm almost dead already . . .  I could barely croak out those words in the hopes that my best friend will hear them and understand their meaning.  It's not that I want to die, who in their right mind does?  It's just that I know that if continue to live my friends will never be safe . . . not from me at least.

            For as long as I can remember, I've fought the Mavericks.  Now I know that the reason there are so many is partly my own fault . . . I was the original carrier for the virus.  I gave it to Sigma, and then he started these wars, spreading the virus to reploids all over the Earth in the process.  It's odd, but a part of me hates Sigma for taking the virus from me.  As much as I hate to admit it, the damned virus is a part of me.  Whenever I come into contact with it . . . I feel as though I've found a missing piece of myself, like I'm one step closer to being completed . . .

            It's ironic that a person who has spent his whole life fighting against something is the one who actually helped bring it about.

            I came here looking for answers.  To find out what that dream about the old man meant.  I wanted answers about my past.  Who made me?  Why was I made?  Am I really destined to kill my best friend or is it my destiny to be killed by X?  Who am I really?  Am I Zero the Maverick Hunter or am I Zero the Maverick, the Red Demon?  I have found a few of the answers, but at what cost?  X and I are dying.  Were these answers really worth it?  Can one put a price on the truth of his existence?

            I know the truth now . . . I was created to be an old man's final attempt to win a losing war against his rival.  I was meant to bring death and destruction to wherever I ventured.  While I may not be under the virus's influence like I was when Sigma first found me, I still have brought death and destruction to this world.  I bear a responsibility for Sigma going to war against the humans, I've killed countless numbers of reploids in the course of my battles, and even those closest to me aren't safe . . .

            Colonel, you were the fellow soldier that my friend X could never be.  He finds nothing desirable about warfare; he doesn't understand the thrill of battle . . . To him it is a necessary evil to stop people like Sigma.  You understood what it meant to be a warrior and to take pride in being one, Colonel.  You were my friend and I killed you.  It was that pride we had in being warriors that wouldn't let us back down from fighting each other.  That pride we shared is what made you challenge me in the first place . . . It was the pride of being a warrior that made you refuse to come to the Hunter HQ and clear up the Sky Lagoon disaster.  

            I keep asking myself if the Repliforce war even had to be fought.  Was it really even necessary for the two of us to fight each other?  I know that when I defeated you, you said that you died happy.  You thought that you had succeeded in buying the time for the Repliforce to escape to the Final Weapon . . . If you had known how the war would end could you have still died happily?  Or was it that you could die happy knowing that you had lost to someone you considered a friend and equal?

            I know you told me to let Iris know that you died happily and had no regrets . . . did you really think that would comfort her?  That it would ease her pain in some way?   I'm afraid telling her that did not comfort her at all.  Then again she wasn't like us.  She didn't understand what drove us to fight each other.  We forced her to stand by and watch as the people she cared for the most tried to kill one another.  The only thing that mattered to us was having our duel . . .

            Iris . . . I'm sorry.  I suppose sorry doesn't even begin to cover it.  I keep wishing that the Repliforce war was just a bad dream.  That I'd wake up and find you still here with me.  I know they say what killed you wasn't my attacks but your attempt to use your brother's power source to fight me.  They say the energy from it fried your circuits before I even managed to defeat you . . . It doesn't matter what they say, I'm still responsible for your death.  The battle between your brother and me pushed you to the breaking point and Colonel's death at my hands was too much for you to bear.  You sided with the Hunters during the war and effectively made yourself traitor in the eyes of the Repliforce.  You gave up everything to help me stop the war Colonel and General were starting and in the end I killed you . . .

            You've always been on my mind since that fateful day Iris.  I still remember holding you as you died.  The physical pain I feel now is nothing compared to how I felt watching you slip away.  I've never felt that helpless before.  Even now, in death, my thoughts still turn towards you.

            There are so many things I wish I had done differently Iris.  I wish that I had told you how I felt.  I never did because I thought we had all the time in the world to figure out what we meant to each other, I thought that you would always be safe and far away from all the fighting.  I wish that I could have prevented our battle from occurring.  I wish I could have at least gotten your body off of the Final Weapon, Cain probably could have revived you . . . I wish that we could have been together the way we wanted to be . . .  I wish I could just reach into myself and yank out that part of me that yearns for the virus; The part of me that actually enjoyed our battle and its end results.  But just wishing for those things doesn't change anything and is ultimately a futile exercise.

            Once I'm dead, maybe I'll be reunited with you Iris, or maybe I'll go to hell to pay for my sins.  Of course, if we are just little more than machines deceived into believing that they are alive, I guess then I will simply cease to exist when I die.

            X, you've been like the brother I never had.  You've always trusted me unconditionally and been there when I needed help but was too stubborn to ask for it.  You risked your own life to retrieve my parts from the X-Hunters, even though you knew that the battles were meant to be a trap.  You were one of the few people who I could completely trust.  I never imagined when I first met you that we would become friends or just how strong that friendship would be.  

            I still can't remember why it is that we fought each other today.  What was the purpose of that battle?  Was it just another meaningless fight?  Was this Sigma's goal all along, to make his two worst enemies destroy each other?  You came after me concerned about the effects the virus was having on me.  All you wanted was for me to return home and show everyone that I was still the same old Zero, not a Maverick.  You asked me to trust you to handle the rest of the battle by yourself.  All you wanted was for me to trust you the way you trusted me.  But the fact that you had apparently considered the possibility that I had gone Maverick hurt, I felt as though you had betrayed me somehow.  My pride kicked in and I felt anger start to build over how you could even entertain the possibility that I might be a threat to people.  I dismissed your concern for my well being and safety as a ploy to lure me back to the HQ.  There, once Lifesavor confirmed the presence of the virus in me, you would have no choice but to kill me before it was too late.  I still can't believe I actually accused you of being a Maverick . . . I don't know why I did that . . . I guess I just wanted to hurt you the way it had hurt me to hear that you thought that I couldn't handle the situation, that there was something unusual and dangerous about my virus reaction.

            I thought if I called your bluff about making me come back to base that you would back down, unable to bring yourself to follow through on the promise that you would fight me if necessary.  It never occurred to me that you were worried enough that you didn't want to risk me being exposed further to a virus that was having a strange effect on me and no apparent effect on you.  I just wanted you to leave because I wasn't sure I could trust myself around you with so much of the virus present.

            There was no point in our battle today . . . it probably could have been avoided entirely.  There's no point in dwelling on it though . . . what happens, happens and there's no point in wishing things had been different.  I only hope that when all this is over, you still think of me as your friend.

            It's odd though X . . . I always knew that we would fight one day, a part of me has always wanted that and looked forward to it.  The stronger you became, the more I wanted to fight you.  But I always believed that if we battled, I would kill you.  I never once thought that you could possibly beat me.  I was making the same mistake as Sigma and everyone else who has fought you . . . I underestimated you.  I arrogantly thought that this battle would be over quickly.  I knew all of your moves, the capabilities of your armors, the weapons you had acquired, and I had figured out which of my attacks to use to counter anything you tried.  At first I held back, I didn't want to kill you or give in to the part of me that would enjoy the fight the way it had enjoyed the battle with Iris.  I could tell that you were holding back too, you didn't really want to fight me.  But neither of us gained an advantage over the other and then I started coming at you with everything I had, giving into that part of me that wanted to fight you . . . even then you fought to me a standstill.  Then you really put your heart into the fight . . . proving to me that no victory over you could be easily achieved and putting me on the defensive.  In the end our fight was a draw . . . even with the extra energy the virus gave me.

            You're much stronger now than you were when we first met.  Then you couldn't even take on Vile by yourself, now you can easily fight on the same level as me.  You aren't just physically tougher either.  Over the years your naiveté has faded only a little, enough to make you question what's going on but not so much that it's hard for you to trust others.  

            X, you **must survive.  The world still needs you and of the two of us, you deserve the chance to live the most.**

            If you do make it out of this somehow . . . then I hope you and Alia pull your acts together.  I'm really getting tired of watching you two ignoring how you feel about each other.  I missed my chance with Iris, X . . . don't you dare make the same mistake I did or I swear I'll come back to just to kick your butt for being so hardheaded.

            Now for your sake, X, and that of our friends, I will end the threat of what I may become by letting go of life.  Who knows?  Maybe someday I can be repaired and freed of the virus that has plagued my existence from birth to death.  X, I hope one day you can understand why this was necessary.

"But now . . . Everything will come to an end . . . Good bye . . . X . . ."

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AN:  That's not it folks, there's still a few chapters left.  I hope to get the next one done soon.  Please read and review.


	3. Sigma

AN:  I'd like to thank everyone who has reviewed my story.  I really appreciate the feedback.  I hope you all continue to enjoy my story.

This time the POV belongs to the Maverick everyone loves to hate . . . Mr. Clean himself, Sigma.

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**Sigma**

            That hurt . . . actually it's amazing that I survived that stunt.  Unfortunately it looks like **they've survived as well.**

            X and Zero the twin banes of my existence . . . I was certain that when I self-destructed that those two would be dead.  I'm too badly damaged and can barely see . . . I can make out a red blur on the ground in front of me, it must be Zero.  I can sense that he's still alive but barely . . .  and I can sense another person still alive.  That could only be X.  His presence is stronger than Zero's, so he must have weathered the blast better.

            I don't get it.  Everything was going according to the plan that the old man and I cooked up.  The virus was spread all over the planet.  The new virus on the colony merged with the strain of the virus that has become my very essence and transformed it into the purest form of the Maverick virus, the only thing capable of restoring Zero to his senses.  Regrettably the amount proved insufficient to bring out Zero's true nature, but even so Zero was still drawn to this place.  He was walking right into my clutches; the old man had even started planning on how to finish the process of making Zero Maverick once more.  I even had the most powerful battle body ever created at my disposal.  So how did it go all wrong?

            X . . . this is his fault.  I would have had Zero were it not for him interfering.

            Obviously I was right to be concerned when X followed Zero here; he had single-handedly stopped my plans in the past and killed me at least a half dozen times.  I should have known he would do so again, but I never believed he would come to a place with such a high virus concentration.  So, I decided to keep a close eye on him as he tracked Zero down.  

            I wonder what X and Zero would have thought if they knew how easy it was for me to keep tabs on them.  I could follow them through the whole base and they would be totally unaware of my presence.  They never knew just easily I could have attacked them at any time I chose or how I was sometimes only standing a few feet away from them.  That's the beauty of this realm the old man calls Zero Space.  The virus is so heavily concentrated that it can bend reality, that's how I was able to follow them without their knowing it.  The virus even created manifestations of enemies they had battled before and assumed the forms of the guardians known as the Shadow Devil and Rangda Bangda.  I used these creations to delay X and Zero while my body was completed.  That's the only reason I didn't attack them, I wanted my other body as close as possible to completion before I risked taking on either one of them.  Besides if I had attacked too early, I might have had to fight both of them at once while they were still at full strength.  I also wondered why they had arrived separately.  X and Zero normally either work as a team or alone.  If they work as a team, both always arrive at the same time.  If they are working alone, then only one of them shows up.  My curiosity got the better of me, so I decided to wait and see what they were up to.  Then something I had always hoped for but never expected happened, my two worst foes turned on each other.

            This fortuitous event warmed my heart.  Maybe Zero was closer to his real self than I had anticipated!  He was willing to fight and risk killing X in order to reach the center of Zero Space, where I was waiting for him, all in the vain hope of finding answers he should already have known.  I stood there, watching them try to rip each other apart and they didn't know I was there!  It was a glorious fight . . . it was more evenly matched than I had expected.  I'm still amazed at how long the battle lasted and that neither of them died.  In all honesty I expected X to be the last one standing.  I know how powerful Zero is, but I doubted his chances because of all the times I had witnessed X's power up close and personal.

            X's power . . . a power that should be mine!  I will never forgive Zero for his interference at Doppler's lab.  I was in my viral form and had X trapped like a rat.  He would have been my new host were it not for Zero.  I know X has only begun to discover his true strength, but I know that using the virus and my tactical genius I could take that power further than even Dr. Light had dared to dream!  I would have been able to capture Zero and crush the Hunters.  I could have completed my plans for eliminating the humans once I seized X's body for my own.  I would have been invincible!  But that idiotic fool had to use Doppler's anti-virus on me, forcing me to retreat or face deletion.  That was probably one of my best opportunities to rid myself of X and increase my own power at the same time.

            Of course revenge is sweet . . . I made Zero suffer for his actions that day.  It wasn't too long after the Third Uprising that the Repliforce was formed and I managed to gain influence there.  Although the primary goal of the Fourth Uprising was making the Repliforce and Hunters wipe one another off the face of the Earth, it gave me the perfect chance to take revenge on Zero and show him what he really is.  I set things up so that the Colonel would inevitably fight Zero.  I could have used that prideful fool to attack X instead, but the psychological effects on Zero would be greater if he were the one to fight Colonel.  Iris was just a bonus.  She and the Colonel had a type of mental link and feeling her brother's death through that link drove her to the brink of madness.  I had learned that originally the two had been meant to be a single, ultimate reploid but were made as separate units because Iris's compassionate, peace-loving nature conflicted with the Colonel's more aggressive, war-like personality.  I had Double recover Colonel's memory chip and power source and bring them to the Final Weapon.  It wasn't long before Iris showed up, distraught over the loss of her brother who in some ways was quite literally a part of her.  It was easy to manipulate her into fighting Zero at this point, without Colonel's sacrifice she never would have listened to me.  I gave her Colonel's chip and power source and assisted her in installing them.  Once Iris installed those components, the programming conflict they created pushed her over the edge and madness took control of her.  Since her programming was not compatible with her brother's fighting protocols she would eventually been destroyed by the conflicting programs.  Not that I cared anyways, I never expected her to beat Zero.  I just wanted her to fight him.  If he lost, I could recover his parts and rebuild him.  If Iris was defeated, then it was no big loss and Zero would have to deal with the psychological scars while he fought me next.  I was only concerned about whether she would live long enough to fight Zero.  Fortunately, she survived long enough to attack Zero and force him to kill her.  The pain he suffered from killing those two deluded pawns of mine was almost enough to make us even for the events in Doppler Town.

            Really, Zero should be thanking me for that.  I showed him the answers to the questions he had about himself.  That day he should have realized who he was and what his purpose in life was, all because of me.  I showed him the truth that those close to him will never be safe from him . . . it is Zero's destiny to destroy X and help the Mavericks bring about a new era of peace and prosperity, free of human corruption and bigotry.

            As disappointed as I am at Zero's stubbornness in embracing his true nature, I eagerly await the day where we will once again fight side by side.  Eventually he will see the light and join me.  If he remains obstinate however . . . well, sometimes you must force salvation upon someone . . . 

            X is moving up and moving towards Zero now.  He doesn't realize that I'm still alive.  I've rerouted some power to my optics so I can see clearer than before.  If I wait just a moment longer X will be in a perfect position for me to launch one last attack at him.  The blue bastard won't know what hit him.  No, I want him to know not just who killed him but that he's about to die and there's nothing he can do to save him or Zero.  Just a little longer and he'll have reached Zero.  He no doubt hopes to save his friend just like Zero did for him today.

            Another opportunity to kill X wasted because of that Zero's meddling.  After the battle with Zero, X was defenseless and I chose to end him then and there.  But Zero cancelled out my attack with a shot from his buster.  

            He may have saved X but the fool still followed me here.  I never expected to beat Zero without the body the old man built for me.  Zero crushed my first body, but was unprepared for my ultimate battle body.  He was too weak to resist for long.  I enjoyed taunting him about his dreams of the old man and how I intended to kill X once I defeated him.  Then X had to show up and attack me.  He did better than Zero since he didn't have to fight my first form and it looked like he might do me in.  Then I started attacking Zero again and my nemesis threw himself in front of my attacks to protect his friend.  X was laying on the ground, beaten, yelling at me to "stop using Zero as a shield" when I told him that I would send the both of them into oblivion together.  An ironic statement considering X was the one acting like a shield for Zero.

            I was so focused on X as the main threat that I ignored Zero.  The next thing I know Zero is leaping to attack the jewel in my forehead with one of his Twin Dream duplicates.  By the time I knew what was happening, my former protégé was about to land the killing blow and I couldn't stop him.  So, I did the only logical thing and self-destructed in the hopes of killing both of them.

            Now here I am . . . barely alive and with a perfect shot at X.  The fool believes I am dead and has turned his back on me.  He he he he, this is too perfect.  At long last I will have my revenge!  Let's see how much you enjoy being killed X!

            "D . . . dro . . . drop dead!"

            I watch as the last of my energy is channeled into a beam of purple light that will finally kill X.  Oh, how I wish I could see the look on his face!  I wish I could see his expression as he realizes that he has failed and is going to die.  I want to see the look of pure agony on his face when my attack hits.

            There!  It went straight through his back and chest, just below his generator.  I can't believe it!  His body exploded!  Oh, how I've waited for this day!  The only thing left of him is his now armless upper body and his head.  Too bad my shot didn't hit his reactor and completely destroy him . . . my targeting sensors must be off.  Not that it matters.  I've won.  I finally won!

            "How persistent . . . you are . . . Die . . . Sigma!"

            ARRGGHH!  No!  Zero . . . how . . . he shot me . . . I'm dying . . . again.  He must have used every last bit of energy he had left . . . the shot still couldn't have been that strong.  Then again in my current state . . . it wouldn't take much to finish me off, especially with after using most of my remaining strength to kill X.

            It's interesting . . . you'd think after all the times I've died, that I'd be used to it.  Apparently dying is not something one gets used to . . . 

            I do not fear death though.  It does not hold the terror for me that it does for others.  For me death is only a temporary setback.  I don't know how, but the virus always brings me back to life.  Therefore I am immortal.  My foes will never be rid of me.  I will simply outlive them if that is what it takes to bring my dream to life.  But I'll be back.  No matter how many times I am defeated, I always come back.  Even with the virus no longer concentrated enough in any one spot to revive me now, I know I will return.  The old man may even speed up my revival or find some patsy to do it for him.  I know Zero will be back as well.  That old man won't allow him to die until he fulfils his function . . . to destroy the Light's legacy, those reploids who are not infected by the virus and who would create a world where their race is subservient to the humans.  Zero and I are born of a different legacy . . . we will end Light's dream and create a true utopia, with me as its benevolent ruler of course.  One day Zero will return to who he once was, that is when everything I have envisioned will come to pass.

            I can feel myself reverting back to my viral form again . . . I can feel that form beginning to dissipate since infecting so many reploids at once has weakened its ability to keep my consciousness intact.  No, I must hold together now or be lost forever . . . I will survive and return stronger than before.  At least X will no longer be a problem.  If I do die for good by some chance, at least I can do so happy in the knowledge that X also shares my fate.

            When I do come back that is something to look forward to though, no more X.  He he he, wish I could say it was nice knowing you X, but I'm just glad to have you out of my hair once and for all . . . Don't worry too much though, many of your Hunter friends will be joining you in death as soon as I am reborn into a new body.

            Now comes the boring part, waiting in limbo until I can get a new host.    That's a small price to pay for immortality though.  Given the current state of the planet however . . . it might take awhile before I find a suitable body.  When I do find a new body, and I **will find a new body, the world shall tremble at my feet once again.  As long as the virus exists, I will continue to return.  That is the one and only constant truth in this world that everyone should realize by now . . . no matter what happens, I'll be back.**

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AN:  Well what do you guys think?  It was kind of hard for me to write this chapter and I'm not really sure how well it came out . . . If I come up with something better for Sigma I'll probably do a quick rewrite.  

I took some liberties with the battle against Sigma.  In the game you can only fight him with X or Zero, but I figured both of them fighting Sigma's final form fit in with the ending scenes and was a bit closer to reality.

Anyways, thank you for reading and please review.


	4. Signas

AN:  I'd like to thank everybody who has read and reviewed my story.  Here's another chapter.  This time it's Signas.

Oh yeah, the part talking about what to do if the Council wanted X and Zero's bodies is inspired by the events that occur in Tuxedo Kamen's fic _Legacy._

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**Signas**

            This has been one hell of a day.  Who would have thought that the Mavericks would take things this far?  

            I suppose the actions taken by Sigma can be taken as a sign of desperation.  After being defeated so many times by X and Zero, he must have come to the conclusion that he could only win by taking such extreme measures as crashing Eurasia into the Earth and seeding the virus all over the world.  Even though we stopped the colony from falling, there are so many new Mavericks now that there is no way we can possibly fight them all if Sigma or someone else manages to unite them into a cohesive attack force.  If that doesn't happen we'll still be hard pressed to handle all of the raids and attacks these new mavericks will eventually launch.  Then you also have to take into account that because of so many Hunters falling prey to the Sigma virus today, our forces will be severely undermanned for the foreseeable future.  It's also likely that in addition to our normal duties, the Council will want the Hunters to play a major roll in the cleanup of the colony debris that will be impacting the planet for the next few days.  I imagine that there will be severe ecological consequences as a result of the debris . . . we may have to continue evacuating the humans to underground shelters.  

            In the past Sigma has made no victory over his forces a total one, this time will be no exception.  The First Uprising left the Hunter organization in shambles.  It was only Sigma's unexpected defeat at X's hands that allowed the tide to turn and gave the Hunters a chance to regroup and launch a true counteroffensive against Sigma's remaining forces.  During the third uprising, Sigma may have been defeated but Dr. Doppler, most of his research on the Maverick virus, and the anti-virus program were lost.  There was still the anti-virus program in Zero's saber . . . but even the best scientists have had a hard time trying to duplicate it and their copies have never been as effective as the original vaccine.  Sigma used the Fourth Uprising to get rid of the Repliforce and gain access to their space station so he could use the Final Weapon.  Again he was foiled, but the Repliforce was no longer a threat to him and the Hunters came under intense political scrutiny for mislabeling the Repliforce as Mavericks.  The Repliforce War also set off a new wave of restrictions on reploids meant to discourage us from going Maverick; it's interesting how such restrictions often cause the exact opposite of their intended effect to happen.  The results of Sigma's actions this time, without him even having an army to back him up, are much worse than any of the previous uprisings.  Even if we defeat Sigma this time, the victory will be a hollow one at best.

            X and Zero headed off to the site of the strange new virus reading - Alia has dubbed it the Zero virus since it has the same readings as Zero - two hours ago.  We lost contact as soon as they went in.  We can't even get any readings from our scanners for that area so we have no way of knowing what's happening.  Alia has been trying to raise X on his communicator ever since he went in and has been unsuccessful, there's just too much interference for a comm. signal to get through.  I don't like this at all.  Now all any of us can do is wait . . .

            Waiting is the worst part of this job.  No matter what orders I issue or strategies I come up with, in the end I must simply wait to see whether or not things will work out.  That's all I can do now.  I really have no other choice but to put all of my faith in X and Zero to get the job done and come back alive.

            The problem is that I don't have the slightest clue what must be done now that we've stopped the colony other than defeating Sigma, but that is up to X and Zero.  We aren't even certain where Sigma is . . . there has been no sign of him since this whole mess started.  He could be where X and Zero went . . . I'm certain that this massive concentration of the Zero virus at point 11F5646 is not some coincidence, it must be Sigma's doing.  He must have somehow gathered it all there for a reason . . . but why?  I just hope Lifesavor is wrong about Zero, otherwise X may wind up having to fight his best friend to the death . . .

            I don't know what got into Zero earlier.  He wasn't even supposed to leave the base for awhile so he could recover from the shuttle mission.  X was supposed to be the one to investigate the viral readings at point 11F5646.  I know Alia had concerns about the idea, but eventually she conceded that it was necessary to learn the truth about the Zero virus and its sudden appearance.  But when Zero found out about the new virus and where it was concentrated . . . he just walked out of the infirmary and went there.  We managed to contact him and order him to return to base . . . but Zero just said to leave everything to him and then he turned off his radio.  

            What was I supposed to do?  I couldn't let Zero just get away with disobeying orders, too many other Hunters look up to him and would probably follow his example.  There was also no way for I could stop him from going there if that's what he wanted to do, other than ordering X to do so and Zero left before we could even consider using that option.  I also couldn't just let Zero walk right into an area full of the Zero virus.  We were already concerned about his strange reaction to the Sigma virus and we had less data on this new virus than the old one . . . There just was no telling how a virus with the same power readings as Zero would affect him.  The only option left was for me to order X to go after Zero. Unfortunately that meant I had to reveal the truth about Zero's virus reaction to X so he would understand why he had to bring Zero back.

            Lifesavor had brought Zero's virus reaction to my attention earlier today.  Contact with the virus seemed to actually make Zero stronger, a reaction that normally only occurs in reploids that go Maverick after contracting the virus.  Other than that, there were no apparent side-effects from his coming into contact with the virus.  X also didn't seem to be affected by the virus, except for very minor system damage.  Zero's reaction prompted Lifesavor to ask me to do something about him and X.  He said it was too dangerous to have them running loose then since we don't know a whole lot about how their systems work or how the virus could affect them.  He urged me to at least do something about Zero . . . what could I have done?  There wasn't enough data to justify quarantining Zero for the duration of the crisis.  Zero showed no signs of Maverick behavior and we needed him out there . . . X and Zero were the only soldiers we had left who could stand up to the reploids with the parts we needed if they chose to not hand them over without a fight.  I told Lifesavor that we should just keep an eye on Zero.  I knew letting Zero continue to go on missions might be dangerous . . . but I thought Zero was immune to the virus.  I still think he may hold the key to defeating it once and for all.

            Now X is hunting down Zero in an area saturated with a new, powerful virus.  I hope Zero is still unaffected by the virus and will come back willingly.  I'd hate to think of what would happen if he and X ever fought each other . . . they'd probably both be so badly damaged that there would be no way for us to repair them.  I don't even know if X would be willing to use his full strength to bring Zero in . . . then again would Zero really even consider attacking X?  After everything they've been through together, I find it hard to believe that Zero would challenge X to a fight.  I'm probably just worried about nothing . . . but if Zero **has gone Maverick, it's better for X to fight him there than it would be to wait for Zero to come after him here or launch an attack against one of the cities we haven't evacuated yet.**

            "What the . . . oh no . . ."

            "What is it Alia?"

            "I'm getting a stronger energy reaction from point 11F5646! It's too strong to get an accurate data sample. I must be reading Sigma . . . I can't think of anyone it could be but Sigma! He's behind all of this . . ." 

            "Alia, can you get a signal through to X!"

            "No Signas, I can't break through the comm. interference . . . I'm not even picking him up on the sensors.  The only reason we even detected Sigma on our scanners through all the interference was because of the massive power spike his appearance generated."

            Damn! This is not good.  We can't warn X about Sigma and we don't even know what's happened to Zero.  Alia is trying to stay calm, but I know she's worried about Sigma's sudden reappearance.  Right now she's frantically trying every last trick she knows to try and reestablish contact with X.  Not that it's probably going to do any good . . . No, I can't start thinking like that.  If anyone can break through the interference, it's Alia.  Besides, X has beaten Sigma numerous times before . . . why would now be any exception?  Hopefully our fears about Zero were unfounded and he's still around to help X.

            Maybe it's wrong for the Hunters to depend so much on two reploids, but for whatever reason it's always those two who are the only ones capable of stopping Sigma.  I just hope that this new virus wasn't just a ruse to lure X and Zero into a trap, though that's what it's starting to look like . . . Sigma's been able to hide his readings from us in the past, so why would we pick him up now?  Is he using one of those huge battle bodies that he's so fond of?

            "Signas!  There's been a massive explosion at the Zero virus's coordinates and the interference is starting to clear up.  I think I can . . . Yes!  I'm picking up a signal from X's comm. unit and transponder. . ."

            The relief in her voice is obvious.  I've noticed lately that she seems to get very concerned about X's safety when he heads out on a mission . . . it's not unusual for a spotter to react that way when one of their friends goes into battle, but Alia always seems a little more agitated when it's X that's out there.  It's probably nothing and there's no reason to get worried as long as her feelings don't interfere with her duties.

            Since I'm standing near her station, I can see the readouts on Alia's terminal confirming that X's communicator is still on.  He must have left it that way so we could contact him if the interference cleared up.  The transponder in his communicator is sending us information from X's own diagnostic programs to let us know his physical condition.  Alia says that from the readings she's getting that X has definitely taken a beating, but nothing irreparable.  I wonder what happened to Zero though . . . either his communicator is still off or . . . no, Zero's probably fine too.  Once the interference clears up a little more we should be able to find him with our sensors . . .

            What? X's readings just changed drastically . . . does that mean . . .   
  
            "X, come in! X, please respond! X! . . . Lifesavor, we need you to get an emergency med team ready to head out to X's location, now! He doesn't have much time!"  
  


            There's an edge of shock and panic to her voice now. It confirms what I feared. X is dieing . . . that's why his readings changed so suddenly. But how? Someone must have attacked him. The explosion we picked up had to be Sigma, so it couldn't be because of him . . .   
  


            Alia is right about needing a med team out there . . . but we need to make sure it's safe first. Whoever attacked X could still be there and the new virus is still in the area . . .

            "Alia, we need to make sure the area is secure before we send anyone in."

            She's looking at me with a mixture of surprise and anger.  I don't blame her, I can hardly believe I just said that myself.  I have to consider the safety of anybody else who goes there right now though.  How could a medical team help X if Sigma is still active and attacks them . . . worse still would be if Zero is the one responsible and he's waiting for someone to come for X . . . plus if there's too much of the new virus in the area anyone who goes in would go Maverick before they could help X or even Zero if he needs it.

            "What are you saying Signas?  He'll be dead before we can confirm whether or not it's safe!  How can you just abandon him like that?!  If you aren't going to send someone, then I'll just go myself!  I stand a better chance of fixing any of the damage to the parts the med team won't understand anyways!"

            Funny, not too many years ago I'd be in agreement with Alia and may have gone there alone myself.  But I'm the Supreme Commander of the Hunter forces now, I can't afford to indulge in such reckless behavior nor can I allow what's left of my command to take foolish, unnecessary chances.  We've lost too many comrades today . . . I'd hate to have to add X and Zero to that list as well, but there's always a chance that they can still be revived if they're not functioning when we recover them.  Until we know for certain that area is safe, I can't let anyone go there.  I don't like this decision anymore than Alia does, but I am the one who must decide whether or not to risk lives by sending a team of Hunters in to recover a single, dying Hunter - possibly two if we ever manage to locate Zero - from a dangerous location that may have hostiles just waiting for more Hunters to arrive.  I am the one who must make that choice, the one who will have to deal with the consequences of a choice that could mean the life or death of my two most trusted commanders and friends.  I know this choice will affect others as well, but the responsibility for what happens afterwards will fall on me . . . 

            I wonder if X and Zero ever had to make this kind of choice during their terms as Supreme Hunter Commander.  Would they really want us to jump blindly into a situation like this just on the off chance we can save them?  In all honesty, I don't know for certain what they would do or would want us to do in this case . . . I can only make the best choice available to me and hope for the best.

            Alia's leaving her station.  Damn!  She's serious about going.  I manage to grab her arm as she walks by.

            "You're right Alia, you do understand how many of X's parts work better than Lifesavor does.  That's precisely why you can't go.  We need you here to help when he's brought back.  If you go and something happens to you, then it will make repairing him that much harder.  Besides we'll need at least five minutes before a security detail can be assembled to go with the med team . . . I suggest you figure out a way to punch through the interference and make sure the area is safe before then so that the med team won't have to wait that long.  Then they might be able to reach X a little quicker and we'll also be able to figure out what's happened to Zero."

            Alia glared at me pretty hard before returning to her station.  She's angry for several reasons.  The first being the most obvious, X is dying and she feels helpless to do anything about it.  She desperately wants to do something to help him besides what little she can do from here.  The second reason is that I'm not sending anyone right away.  The third reason is that she knows I'm right about why she can't go.  It's hard enough for us to repair minor damage to X and if any of those un-analyzable systems of his are damaged, we need someone with Alia's expertise in reploid design to either repair those systems or build a suitable substitute for them.

            I really do hope she can figure out a way to get the remaining interference and do the scan before the five minutes are up.  It would certainly improve the odds of us getting to X in time and figuring out what happened to Zero . . . I don't really want to go down as the commander who had two living legends die on his watch.

            "No . . .  he's gone . . ."

            What?  Did I hear her right?  X . . . he's dead . . . It feels like a Chimera ride armor just punched me in the stomach.  I knew this was a possibility – it's a risk that every Hunter takes whenever they go on a mission – but knowing something is possible doesn't always keep you from being shocked when it does happen.  I mean this is X we're talking about . . . a man considered by many to be virtually unstoppable when it comes to fighting.  X has survived so much during his career as a Hunter that we've just taken it as a given that he'll complete the mission and come back safely . . . but there's no mistaking what the tone of Alia's voice meant . . . he's dead . . .

            She didn't even say it that loudly, but the Command Center just went completely quiet.  I've never once been in here when there hasn't been some kind of noise and activity going on . . . right now it's almost as still and silent as a graveyard.

            As hard as it is to admit, it looks like there was nothing we could have done to help him even if a team had left right away . . . maybe Alia's wrong and X's communicator shut off, if not then maybe X can be revived like Zero was during the Second Uprising . . . but I'm not sure that's possible even if we get Dr. Cain to assist us.

            We don't know even know what Zero's status is.  What if he's gone too?  I know Alia believes Sigma has spread the virus to thin to ever resurrect himself again, but Sigma has a reputation for coming back right when you think he's gone for good.  If Sigma does come back . . . how are we supposed to handle him?  X and Zero are the only ones capable of going one-on-one with him and Sigma is always so heavily defended that an assault force would have a hard time getting to him and I've heard the stories about how, in some of the earlier uprisings, Sigma massacred entire Hunter units by himself.

            The threat doesn't even have to be Sigma . . . just one of his more powerful followers or even another Maverick almost as strong as him could just as easily present us with the same problem.  How do you stop a Maverick whose power is greater than all but two of your best fighters if those warriors are dead?

            This is possibly the most crippling blow Sigma could have dealt us.  Not only are both of our best fighters possibly out of commission for good, but what's left of the Hunter's morale is about to get smashed.  This whole experience has been a desperate fight against time and with so many of the planet's reploid population now Maverick . . . morale has really dropped.  The success of the shuttle mission gave us hope again, but this . . . this is the worst thing that could have happened to us other than Sigma wiping us out with the colony.

            I haven't even fully accepted what's just happened, a part of my mind still refuses to believe this is happening . . . I guess I'm still in shock.  I can't afford to let the others see just how shaken up this is making me.  I have to at least put on a show of confidence.  I'll have time to deal with what's happened emotionally later, right now everyone's going to be looking to me for what we do now.  It won't do them any good if I let myself get paralyzed by all the fear, sadness, anger at what's happened, and shock that I'm experiencing.

            Because of my position, I am ultimately responsible for the lives and well-being of my men.  Unless Alia is wrong and we get some good news from the recovery teams that we'll have to send to the site eventually, I'm going to have to hold things together now.  I've been lucky enough that no major attacks or uprisings occurred for several years after I took command of the Hunters from my predecessor.  That grace period just ended a little over 24 hours ago.  I most likely won't have X and Zero to help me get through whatever the future has in store . . . I guess it's time to see what I'm really made of.  I'll do everything that I'm capable of to hold this organization together and rebuild it.  The Mavericks won't win . . . I won't allow X and Zero to have given their lives to stop Sigma just to let the remaining Mavericks finish what he started.  I'll have time later, when I'm off duty, to grieve for my friends . . . I know it sounds cold, but right now I need to focus on what to do next and how to keep things from falling apart any more than they already have.  That's the price I pay for being the leader, I must put those under my command and the good of the Hunter organization as a whole ahead of my own personal feelings and concern.

            I should start arranging for recovery teams to go to the site and see if they can find any salvageable remains of our two best Hunters – maybe there will be enough of them left so that they can be brought back to life.  I also need to start figuring out a way to break the news to everyone else in the base if that's not the case.  How do you tell everybody that two legends just died?  

            Most of the Hunters here have heard the stories about X and Zero's exploits their whole lives.  Many of them view those two as invincible; that it's just not possible for them to be defeated or die . . . I myself am even a little guilty of that.  How am I supposed to ease the fears of other Hunters when this news breaks when I'm not sure I can do that for my own fears?  There's not going to be much time to grieve for this loss before we're back to fighting against the Mavericks either.  If they find out about what's happened, there's no way they won't try to take advantage of it.

            If X can't be repaired and Zero's in the same shape . . . then we have to deal with the issue of what to do with their bodies.  It would upset everyone even more if we just tossed the bodies of two of the most revered Hunters in existence into a recycling facility, which is SOP for disposing of reploid bodies . . . there's no way I'd allow that to happen them anyways.  The Council will probably order us to hand them over to the Reploid Research Group or some other scientific organization so that they can dissect X and Zero's remains to see what they can learn.  Naturally most of their efforts would focus on using what they learn to come up with new and better weapons - but I doubt X would be too thrilled with that given his pacifistic nature.  If the Council does try something like that, they'd alienate most of the Hunters still willing to fight against the Mavericks and the remaining non-Maverick reploid population . . . we reploids don't have that many heroes and letting scientists tear apart the remains of two legends definitely wouldn't go over to well.  Many humans would also protest about X and Zero being treated like that . . . the council would have to keep the whole thing under wraps or risk a political backlash, not to mention all the reploids who might decide to sign up for the Maverick cause if they do try to go through with it.

            Could I really disobey a direct order from the Council if it came to that?  It's not like they'll be in too much of a position to demand anything from us after today.  They'll need our help to rebuild the planet and keep them safe.  What could they threaten us with if we don't comply?  Most of the human militaries were forced to abandon their heavier weaponry to evacuate to the shelters and it's not going to be safe on the surface for humans for a long time . . . but I have no intention of causing a rift between the humans and reploids, that goes against everything the Hunters have been fighting for over the past two decades.  I also don't want them to just start chopping up my X and Zero and analyzing them as though they were nothing more than interesting machines!  It'd be almost like how a child takes a toy apart just to see how it works and then not being able to put it back together.  Reploids have always been treated with much less regard than humans, even though we think in the same manner as them and have the same emotions.  That fact alone should be reason enough to view us as more than just some useful machine or tool!  But in the end, that's all we are to some humans.  Those same humans would have no problem taking apart their most useful "tools" to see what they can learn from them in death that they couldn't from examining them when they were alive.

            I'll deal with that situation if the need arises.  I'll do everything I can to resolve it without the Hunters turning on the humans . . . I won't allow that to happen.  I fear however that should that situation arise, I will have no choice but to comply with the Council's wishes.

            Hopefully the Council won't do anything until after the Hunter computer unlocks X and Zero's final requests.  That will let us know what they want us to do with their bodies and their possessions . . .

            What am I thinking?  Have I really already given up hope that they'll be okay?  I guess I'm being realistic . . . but until we get word from the recovery teams, I should at least try and have some hope.  Still, I must be prepared for the worst case scenario . . . 

            "Alia, finish your scan of the area and prepare to have recovery teams sweep the area for any remains."

            X, Zero . . . If we're too late already, I'm sorry we couldn't help you . . . in that case, goodbye my friends . . . rest in peace.

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AN:  So what do you think?  This chapter was actually the hardest to write so far.  Please review and let me know what you think.  I'd appreciate any suggestions you may have to improve my writing .


	5. Alia

AN:  Okay, I guess I've made you wait long enough.  Here's Alia's POV.

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**Alia******

            This isn't happening.  It can't be happening.  He's dead . . . X is dead . . .

            I don't know why but I knew something bad would happen if he went there . . . it was more of a feeling really . . . a feeling that if he went after Zero, I'd never see him again.  I even went so far as to ask him to just let Zero handle the situation at point 11F5646 alone.  That's pretty unusual for me though . . . I've never just acted on a feeling like that, I've always tried to have some kind of evidence to back up any claim or suggestion I make.  I guess always relying on hard evidence was something I picked up from being a scientist.

            There's no denying it though.  I heard everything that happened . . . When we first started getting a signal from X's communicator I was so relieved.  I didn't realize just how worried not knowing what was going on there was making me.  I felt euphoric from just hearing his voice again . . . it sounded like he was talking to Zero and from X's tone and what he was saying it sounded like Zero was badly hurt.  I couldn't tell if Zero was responding since his communicator was still off and the way helmet communicators are rigged you can only hear the person using it unless there's a very loud noise like shouting or weapons fire nearby.  Before I could even let X know that we were getting his signal . . . before I could say anything . . . it happened.  I heard a faint buzzing noise, the sound of armor being blown apart, and X's scream . . . Then the readings from his transceiver indicated that he had just sustained heavy damage and was dying.  He must have been shot, that's the only explanation I can think of.  The humming noise I heard had to be some kind of energy beam and a powerful one to do so much damage.  It didn't sound like a buster shot and I don't think a beam saber would be loud enough for it's sound to be picked up by a helmet's comm. unit . . . so hopefully that means Zero wasn't the one who attacked him.  On the other hand that would mean that it was Sigma or one of his henchmen that did it.  I heard another shot shortly after X's scream, a buster this time.  So either X retaliated against his attacker or Zero took whoever it was out.

            I don't care if whoever killed X is dead, it won't bring him back.  It's just not fair!  Why did he have to die?  X didn't deserve to die . . . 

            It's already been two days since it happened.  The recovery crews have been scouring the debris found at point 11F5646 nonstop for the whole 48 hours.  They haven't found any sign of X or Zero, not even a scrap of armor.  Signas intends to keep the teams searching the area until some trace of them is found . . . but the odds of that happening seem to be getting slimmer with each passing moment.  It's unusual that there's no sign of their remains anywhere . . . it's already caused rumors to start circulating that some surviving Mavericks carted off their bodies.

            I don't even want to think about that possibility.  God only knows what Mavericks would do to their remains, it's not like X and Zero were their most favorite people in the world.  I remember hearing stories about what a group of Mavericks did to some Hunter corpses a while back . . . they said that the Mavericks decorated their lair with the dismembered body parts.  The Mavs gouged out the eyes of the Hunters and ripped the synthflesh off of their faces.  I heard they even hung some of the bodies on the walls and ceilings like they were trophies.  At least those Hunters were already dead when all of that was done to them . . . I've heard even worse stories about Hunters who were captured by the Mavericks.  Many were tortured to death, only to be revived just so they could be tortured again or be infected with the Maverick virus.  Occasionally Hunters who were tortured would escape, but usually by then they were on the brink of madness.  A few never fully recovered mentally from their experience and had to be discharged or reassigned . . .

            I still can't believe Signas didn't send help immediately.  I thought he was X's friend.  How could he just leave X to die like that?  I should have gone out there regardless of what Signas told me to do . . . I could have at least been by X's side when he died, so he wouldn't have had to face those final, terrifying moments before death by himself . . . After all X has done for us, the least we could have done was be there to try and comfort or help him in his final moments.  Instead we let him die all alone in what turned out to be a Maverick stronghold in the middle of some godforsaken wasteland!  No Hunter should have to die like that!  Least of all X . . . 

            I know there's probably nothing I could have done to help X and that Signas was right . . . it was too dangerous to go out there right away.  We didn't have any clue what had just happened.  Still, I was willing to go out there weaponless to try and save him, even if I risked death or infection in the process.  None of those things mattered to me; I just wanted to be able to do something for him . . . even if all I could do was be by his side when he passed away.

            It's just not fair . . . Why?  Why did it all have to end like this?  Why does it feel like I'm being ripped apart from the inside?  Since joining the Hunters, I've had several friends fall in combat and it always hurts when your friends die . . . but why does losing X seem to hurt so much more?

            God, I'm crying now . . . I haven't cried, or more accurately let myself cry, since the whole mess with Gate and his creations.  Gate was my friend, probably the only real friend I had at the RRG, and I betrayed him.  I knew that he was breaking a lot of the rules for conducting experiments there; on more than one occasion I even tried to help him cover up his actions.  Then another one of my colleagues, Trent, showed me what he claimed was evidence proving that Gate's creations were too dangerous to let live.  It was footage of Wolfang attacking some reploids – I later found out those reploids were actually mavericks who had attacked his team – and of Blaze Heatnix deliberately leading a team of researchers to their deaths in a lava pit.  Then some of my other colleagues at the RRG - people I considered friends at the time - told me that if I helped them get rid of Gate's creations, then Gate wouldn't be persecuted for their behavior.  They also told me that if I didn't help destroy Gate's creations, that then there would be no choice but to expose their danger to the public and possibly to destroy Gate along with them.  This threat seemed more credible after the attempt on Gate that destroyed Rainy Turtliod.  I found out later that everything Trent and my "friends" had told me was a lie.  

            They lied to me and tricked me into helping them . . . all so they could destroy Gate's credibility and get their hands on his research.  I still remember the look of bitterness and betrayal in Gate's eyes when he found out about my involvement . . . I had never felt so awful in my life.  I couldn't believe that the whole thing was just a maneuver to rid of Gate because several of the RRG's higher ups didn't trust him and some of our colleagues were jealous of him, Gate had been receiving attention and outside funding from many important figures in politics and industry because he could get them results quickly.  When I learned the truth . . . I just couldn't stay there anymore . . . I wanted to get away from that place and from people more concerned about advancing their own careers than actually accomplishing anything good.  So when a recruiter approached me about joining the Hunters as a spotter . . . I didn't even hesitate to take the offer.  Before I left though, I vowed that I would never betray a friend like that again or fail them if they needed my help.  I also decided to become stronger so that I couldn't be tricked or manipulated like I was before.

            It was shortly after I had finished training to be a spotter that I was assigned to the 17th Unit because of my high scores.  That's when I met him, X.  He was so nice and he had this . . . this way of putting the people around him at ease . . . X was just so easy to get along with.  He was nothing like the fierce warrior that the news crews made him out to be, the man who often single-handedly wiped out entire armies.  I was surprised to learn that he didn't like fighting at all.  He said he only fought because the alternative was to just stand by and let the Mavericks commit genocide . . . and he couldn't standby and allow something like that to happen.  Still it always amazed me how a person as kind and compassionate as X could transform, during battle, into an unstoppable fighter whose only goal was victory.

            In all honesty, I hate fighting as much as X did.  I remember how I felt when I helped kill Scaravich and Wolfang . . . the sick, hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach.  Is that how X felt every time he had to kill a Maverick?  Of course the fact that the two reploids I killed didn't really deserve it makes what I did worse . . . to my knowledge X has never killed an innocent person.

            The first thing they tell you in the spotter classes is that it's dangerous to form an emotional bond with the people you're spotting for.  It can cause additional stress and put lives in jeopardy if you aren't careful.  The second thing the instructors tell you is that since it's impossible to not get attached to the Hunters you spot for . . . to just be careful to not let your feelings interfere with your duty or your ability to carry it out.  A single mistake on the part of a spotter can endanger an entire Hunter unit.  They're right though . . . it's just not possible to avoid getting attached to the people you spot for.  If a spotter doesn't screw up on the first mission that involves combat, then the team they're assigned to learns to trust the spotter with their lives.  Also from that point on the unit considers that spotter to be part of their team . . . they treat you no differently than any other member of the unit and even invite you to come with them when they go out to celebrate or to just get away from the base for a while.  You feel like your part of a family and that's a pretty damn good feeling.

            Of course sometimes you get closer to a particular Hunter than you do with the others . . . that's kind of how it was with me and X.  I don't really know when I started to get close to him, but it happened somehow.  I know we felt the same way about fighting . . . but that wasn't the sole basis of our friendship.  We enjoyed just hanging out together, talking, and occasionally challenging each other to games of chess or poker – X actually had a pretty good poker face, but I could still figure out when he was bluffing.  Sometimes it would just be the two of us sitting alone in the 17th's common area, reading books or watching TV, and simply enjoying the peace, quiet, and each other's company.  I just liked being around him . . . 

            I wish Signas hadn't told me to take a few hours off.  I probably do need it; I've been up for almost 72 hours straight with no downtime since this whole mess began.  Like humans, reploids need a few hours of sleep every so often and going too long without it can adversely affect our mental functions.  When reploids sleep our bodies perform standard diagnostic and maintenance functions, we conserve energy, and sometimes we even dream.  Most people think that a reploid needs to be in a recharge pod to go to sleep . . . it's not really necessary, we only do so in order to replenish our energy reserves if needed . . . the only reason we sleep then is because it's boring to be awake while stuck in recharging pod.  But right now, I can't even fall asleep in my own bed let alone stuck inside some pod . . . I keep thinking about X.  My mind keeps playing back everything I heard over the comm. channel before he died and my imagination keeps conjuring up visions of him lying there, dying, his body mangled from the attack . . . 

            Dammit X! Why couldn't you keep your promise?  You told me that there was nothing to worry about . . . you said you'd be back as soon as you found Zero . . . Why did you have to go off and die?!

            As much as I try to accept the fact that you're gone, there's still a part of me that believes you'll be walking through the HQ's main entrance any minute or that the recovery crews will find you alive under some debris at the site of your last battle.  I just can't let go of the feeling that you aren't really gone . . .  that you'll come back here . . . to me.  I know it's a stupid, foolish idea to cling to, but I can't give up that final hope.  I don't want to give up and write you off like everyone else has!  Maybe I should listen to that feeling . . . if my earlier unsubstantiated belief that something bad would happen if you went after Zero was on the mark, then maybe this one will be right too.  It's probably just wishful thinking but I hope with everything I am that it's not and you'll turn up alive.

            But for that to happen it seems like it would take a miracle right now and I don't believe in miracles.  I'm not sure why, I just don't.  I don't think reploids really believe in miracles or that they happen to us.  There's always a logical explanation for everything.  Maybe that's why I don't believe in them.  I guess that I can't accept that something can happen and have no real rational or reasonable explanation.  Still . . . I find myself hoping for a miracle even though it will never happen and if it did I would probably drive myself nuts trying to figure out some logical explanation for it rather than just accepting that it happened.

            The one thing that still bugs me and fuels my hope that you're still alive is that the readings we got from your transceiver just vanished.  The readings never flat lined and they never indicated that your reactor finally hit critical mass; in fact you had at least one minute left before that was going to happen.  The transceiver readings simply disappeared as though your communicator was turned off or you were deactivated . . . 

            It's probably just wishful thinking again.  The communicator most likely just lost power or was damaged.  Of course a damaged communicator could broadcast incorrect transceiver data . . . Why am I torturing myself like this?!  Why am I clinging to this foolish hope that X is alive when everything indicates otherwise?  He's gone . . . the sooner I deal with it the sooner I can get on with my life.  If he were still alive then he would have come back by now or the recovery teams would have found him just sitting there, waiting for somebody to come get him.  The same goes for Zero if he were still around . . . but from the way X sounded, Zero may have been dying already when he was attacked.

            Zero . . . I've been so worked up about X that I nearly forgot about him.  Why did he run off to where the virus was like that?  What was he looking for?  Why did that new virus's readings match his perfectly?  I've been hearing rumors lately that Zero has some connection to the Maverick virus . . . the Zero virus's existence only seems to support this belief.  Zero couldn't have any connection with the virus though; he hates what the Mavericks do as much as everybody else.  Why would he fight the Mavericks if he had something to do with the virus?  I've also heard that Sigma has been trying to recruit Zero to the Maverick's side for years now . . . maybe that's what the virus was, some pathetic attempt to make Zero join the Mavericks.  Of course Zero was having some kind of weird reaction to the Sigma virus . . . I know he came into contact with it several times during the missions to gather parts for the Enigma and the shuttle, but we had so much difficulty differentiating the virus's readings from his that there was no way to tell just how much of an effect it really had on him . . . Not that it really matters now since Zero's probably dead.

            Zero couldn't have been infected with the virus like some people seem to believe, he didn't show any signs of Maverick behavior.  Granted his power levels started increasing about the time the virus was released, but combat reploids like Zero are known to have occasional sudden increases in power.  Then again the rate at which Zero's strength was growing was abnormally high . . . but there's a lot we didn't know about his design so that growth could have been normal for him.  I find it hard to believe that X or Zero could fall prey to the Maverick virus.

            I wasn't quite as close to Zero as I was X, but he was someone I thought of as a good friend.  Like X, I met him when I began spotting.  Even though most of the time I spotted for the 17th, I also spotted for Unit 0 on several occasions.  He was always so serious during battle or training, but he acted very light-hearted the rest of the time.  Zero was almost always up to something . . . organizing a party to celebrate a successful mission, hauling X and various members of both their units off for nights on the town, or usually just relaxing in his quarters or at the small park that's located on the base.  I remember how Zero used to tease me about how much time I spent with X.  He'd always get this strange grin on his face whenever he saw us together; it was like he saw or knew something we didn't.  

            I always found it odd that no matter how at ease or relaxed Zero appeared to be during the periods of peace that usually followed a Maverick defeat, there were times where it  felt as though he was very restless.  It was like he was just killing time until his next battle . . .

            I remember that on one occasion, I think it was the anniversary of the Repliforce War, Zero got into this horrible mood where almost everyone would be afraid to get anywhere near him.  I tried asking Zero what was bothering him and got my head bit off each time I talked to him.  Zero was never really one to discus his feelings with others . . . but I'd never seen him react so violently to being asked if anything was wrong before.  The way he behaved was just so unusual for him.  Eventually I did find out why he behaved like that, I overheard some members from Unit 0 mention that it probably had to do with a girl who died during the Repliforce War, Iris.  I asked X about her, but he was hesitant to tell me about what happened between her and Zero back then . . . he felt it was something that should be left up to Zero to decide whether or not I should know about it.  Eventually Zero came and apologized to me for the way he behaved after he had calmed down.  Zero explained about Iris and why he had been behaving like he had been . . . apparently Zero never really got over Iris's death or forgave himself for what happened.  At the time I couldn't imagine what Zero must have went through, but since X died . . . I think now I have some inkling.

            That was one of the few times Zero opened up to me.  Though I'm sure X talked him into it, it still meant a lot to me that he did. 

            X and Zero were almost inseparable.  Sometimes the way they behaved you thought the two of them really were brothers, especially when they'd get into an argument.  I haven't seen many reploids who had a friendship with someone that was strong as the one X and Zero had.  Then again it's probably not too surprising; they knew each other for over two decades, even if they did behave more like teenagers at times than the oldest Hunters in existence.

            I do miss Zero . . . but I miss X even more . . . why?  Both of them were my friends . . . are my feelings for X really that strong?

            I wish I hadn't been given this time off.  I can't get any rest.  I should be helping coordinate the recovery teams.  I should be doing something other than just lying here in my room . . . I don't want to deal with these feelings right now, it hurts too much.  I guess that's part of why Signas told me to take some time off . . . so I couldn't just bury myself in my work to avoid dealing with what's happened.  As it is right now, I have no choice but to deal with it.  

            I don't want anyone to see me like this.  I'm depressed, crying, and all these feelings assault me when I think about X . . . regret, pain, sorrow, a little bit of joy when I happen to remember some of the good times we had, and this void I feel inside of me, it feels like someone ripped out a piece of my heart.  What do I have to regret in my relationship with X?  That it didn't get a chance to go further than just being friends?  Is that what this pain is?  Not just the loss of someone close to me, but the pain of what might have been?  

            What am I thinking?!  I barely knew X that long.  Douglas has known X for well over a decade, Signas has known X for almost as long, and Zero knew him for even longer than that.  Hell, the only people who have known X for a shorter time than me are the rookies that just finished training!  I've known him for what?  Maybe three years now?  Then again that's about half of my life . . . still, what makes me so much more entitled to take this harder than everyone else seems to be?  I mean I liked X, I liked him a **lot** actually, but it's not like I was in love with him. I mean just because I like to spend time with a particular guy and happen to like the sound of his voice, the way he smiled, admired how kind and caring he could be . . . and because of how I'd get so scared whenever he entered battle against one of those psychotic Maverick commanders, the way I would worry when we lost his comm. signal or when he would pull some crazy maneuver and nearly get himself killed while doing it . . . that doesn't mean I was in love with him . . . does it?  That's just great.  If I was in love with him, why couldn't I have figured it out before X died?  If something had happened between us, would this pain I feel now be less because of what we would have had or greater?  If I wasn't in love with him, why am I torturing myself with these thoughts?  Why does it hurt so much that I'll never see him again?  It hurts more than anything I've ever felt before . . .

            I'm a wreck.  I'm really glad that X can't see me like this.  I've worked so hard to become stronger, so nobody could manipulate me like they did back at the RRG.  I've developed a reputation here for being tough and cool under stress.  I don't know why, but it became important to me that X didn't see me as weak shortly after I met him.  I wanted him to know he could count on me and that I wouldn't just snap in a high pressure situation.  I wanted him to believe that I could handle whatever got thrown at me.  

            But when I overheard Signas tell X about Zero's reaction to the virus and that he wanted X to go after him . . . I just got this overwhelming feeling of dread.  I felt like I would lose him if he went there.  I know I had agreed earlier that X should investigate the virus readings at point 11F5646, but all of a sudden it felt like a very bad idea.  It didn't help that I had misgivings about the initial decision to send X to investigate, but the idea of sending him after Zero just strengthened those feelings.  I begged X not to go after Signas had finished talking to him and left, I still can't believe I actually did that . . . but just then I didn't care if X thought of me as weak for begging him not to go, to let Zero deal with the situation by himself.  I just wanted X to still be around . . . I wanted him to stay here with me, where he'd be safe.  I know it was probably selfish of me to ask such a thing of him, but I didn't care at the time.  X, he just looked at me with those beautiful emerald eyes of his and told me not to worry.  "Everything will be fine," he said, "I have to prove to everyone that Zero isn't the threat they seem to think he is.  I promise I'll find him and the two of us will come back safely, Alia.  Don't worry."  

            Once it became clear he wouldn't change his mind, I went back to my station and he left to go after Zero.  I shouldn't have let him go!  I should have tried harder!  Maybe he would have stayed.  Then he would be alive, Zero would have taken Sigma out himself and come back safely, and things could just go back to the way they were before that awful day.

            But I didn't try harder . . . now both of them are gone . . .

            I still remember my last words to X . . . I told him that I wouldn't try to stop him from fighting . . . that I'd trust him to handle the situation.

            It's not like there was much else I could do.  He was intent on going and like always the only thing I can ever do for him in the end is support him in any way I can.  It's horrible . . . feeling so helpless to do anything when your friends are risking their lives in battle.  I know my job as a spotter is important, the information I can give to Hunters in the field helps them accomplish their missions and sometimes even saves their lives, but that doesn't make it any easier to sit at the base safe and sound while people are fighting for their lives.  Of course that's not nearly as bad as the feeling of anxiety when you lose contact with a Hunter completely and can do nothing whatsoever to assist him.  I was prevented from helping X in any way once he went to that place . . . I hate not being able to do anything to help the people I care about.  Maybe X would have survived if I had just been better at my job.  Maybe we could have gotten him out of there before anything happened if I had tried a little harder to break through the interference.

            I know I did everything I could from here to try and help him throughout the whole ordeal with the Colony . . . but I can't help but feel like I failed him . . . like there was something more I should have been able to do . . .

            Damn it!  I wish I could just stop thinking about all of this and fall asleep.  Of course then I'd probably just dream about what happened . . . or who knows maybe I'd have a pleasant dream instead.  Actually, I wish that I could just wake up and find out that everything that happened in the last three days was just a nightmare.  Then I could just forget about it, go back to work, and see both X and Zero alive and well.

            I know everyone says that as long as you remember those who have passed on they aren't really gone.  But that often comes across as sounding empty to one who is grieving; it's only the compassion behind such words that mean anything.  Personally I like the idea of X, Zero, and all the other friends I've lost still existing somehow even after the loss of their physical shell, not just as memories either . . . who am I kidding?  When you're dead, that's it.  Then they just ship your body off to a recycling center to be scraped, maybe turn you into soda cans, paper weights, or something like that.

            I know X would probably be telling me to not rule something like the afterlife just because there's no solid proof that there is one . . . he always did believe that reploids were more than just the sum of their programming, even if he didn't talk about it a whole lot.  That's understandable though, most people and even some reploids wouldn't take an idea like reploids having souls seriously . . . I guess X must have really felt he could trust me with anything to have even let me know that he believed that.

            As much as I would like to believe that we are more than just machines and that somewhere X still exists . . . it's hard for me to do so since there is really no way of testing that belief.  Well, there is one way . . . No!  I'm not going to even consider that.  X wouldn't want me to just through my life away!  No matter how bad things may look right now, he wouldn't want me to give up like that . . .  He'd want me to live, fulfill my dreams, to be happy, to not let myself or everything that he fought so hard for to fall apart.

            That still doesn't mean I can't wish X were still here.   I'd feel a lot better if he were still alive to help us face whatever will happen next . . . after everything that's happened today, the future's not looking too bright and the deaths of X and Zero seem like an ominous omen of what is yet to come.

            He's gone forever . . . no matter how badly I want it to not be true, X is never coming back.  So why can't I let go of this silly notion that he isn't gone?  Why do I have this nagging feeling that all of my sorrow and pain over his death is somehow premature?  Why is a part of me secretly hoping for a miracle that will never come to pass?  Why do I want so badly to believe that there is more to reploids than just metal, processors, and programming?  Why am I examining all of these feelings I apparently had for X now, when it won't do any good?

            I can't believe how tired I feel.  Between not getting any rest, crying myself silly, and driving myself nuts thinking about what's happened it's no wonder I'm feeling so exhausted physically and mentally.  I'm so tired but I can't fall asleep . . . I keep thinking about X . . .

            I miss him so much . . . maybe I really do . . . 

            "Alia, respond please."

            Huh?  I guess I forgot to turn off my communicator.  I may as well respond, it's not like I'm about to fall asleep anytime soon.

            "What is it Lifesavor?"

            "Would you please come to the infirmary at once?  I may require your assistance shortly."

            Why would Lifesavor need my help?  I thought the medical staff didn't get hit nearly as hard as the field Hunters and other personnel.  Maybe having to deal with the recent inflow of refugees has left him more short handed than we thought.  That has to be the case.  Why else would he tap someone who used to design reploids to help him in the infirmary?  Maybe this will distract me long enough to stop thinking about X.

            "I'll be there in a minute Lifesavor."

            "Thank you Alia."

            "I take it things are pretty hectic down there if you're asking me to help out."

            "Things are still a little crazy down here, but that's not why I called you.  Actually, Douglas and I figured you'd want to be here even if we wound up not needing your help."

            "What do you mean?"

            "A new patient is coming in and you'll never guess who it is.  Lifesavor, out."

            What did he mean by that?  What's Douglas doing there?  I thought he was overseeing the recovery teams.  Why would Lifesavor need my help with an incoming patient?  He's a lot better equipped to handle diagnostics and repairs than I am . . . I mean the only reason he normally consulted me in the past was if . . . could it be?

            No!  I shouldn't get my hopes up like that.  But that's the only explanation I can think of for why Lifesavor would be calling me and why Douglas would be there too.  Is it possible?  Did the part of me that was hoping for a miracle really get its wish?

            Well, I'm not going to find out by just sitting here.  I better head to the infirmary and see just who this patient of theirs is.

*************************************

AN:  Whew!  This part ended up being longer than I thought it would be.  I hope you liked it.  I tried really hard because I didn't want to mess this one up.  Thank you for reading!  Please review and let me know what you think.


	6. Douglas

AN:  Here's the next chapter of my story.  This time, we'll here from Douglas.

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**Douglas******

            I can't wait to see the look on her face.

            Alia has really taken X's purported death pretty hard.  She tries not to show it, but it's obvious if you know what to look for.  The eyes almost always give away what a person is feeling and hers have had a kind of dead look to them recently, like she's trying not to feel anything about what happened.  That's not the best way to deal with losing somebody . . . then again it's also a common response from people who just aren't ready to deal with whatever feelings such an event evokes.

            I may not know Alia as well as some others, but I know how she behaves normally well enough to tell how rough these last few days have been for her.  Normally Alia is actually a reasonably cheerful, friendly person when off-duty, but when it comes to her job she always becomes dead serious about what she's doing and always tries to keep her emotions in check . . . though from some of the rumors I've heard, her control slips a little when X is the one in serious danger.  Lately though, she's been behaving depressed and subdued.  Alia has also been focusing all of her energy into her job . . . I know she can be a bit of a workaholic on occasion, but she's never allowed her job to dominate her time like this before.  I can only think of two reasons for her sudden change in behavior . . . she either couldn't accept that X might be gone for good or she was trying to avoid dealing with whatever pain she was experiencing as a result of accepting that X was gone.  Just the fact she's taken what many of us thought to be X's death so hard kind of makes me wonder what her exact feelings towards X are . . . if her feelings for him go beyond simple friendship . . . I suppose that it's really none of my business either way.  

            I guess maybe I do know her a bit better than I thought . . . funny how you don't always realize how well you may know a person . . . then again going through a crisis like the colony drop with someone has a way of quickly establishing bonds and making you get to know somebody.  Until recently most of my dealings with Alia have either been in staff meetings, she is the chief communications officer after all, or when she was studying X's old armor components.  I still remember how surprised she was to find out we kept all of the parts from the armors X totaled to see what we could learn from them.  Signas cleared her to examine the parts because of Alia's reploid engineering background, in case she could discover something about them that we hadn't . . . Somehow she managed to repair a few components from some of the armors and then actually started using them to build a new armor based off of X's Nova Armor, the Fourth Armor.  It was almost a perfect copy of the Nova Armor.  It just lacked a giga-crush and her version of the Weapons Energy Cycling System was less efficient than Dr. Light's, but it still gave X considerably more energy for his copied weapons.  It was pretty shocking that she was able to do it - even Dr. Cain had little luck repairing X's armors, let alone building a nearly exact copy of one from left over parts.

            Alia really has been through a lot in the past few days, all of us have really.  But I know this little surprise that we found at point 11F5646 is really going to cheer her up . . . I'd like to claim that I never doubted for a minute that X survived what happened, but even I was starting to lose hope about that being true.

            It was hard for me to even consider that X and Zero might be dead.  I mean it's one of those events whose odds of happening seem to be so low, it ranks right up there with Hell freezing over . . . then again most people felt the same way about a space colony nearly crashing and wiping out all life on Earth until a few days ago.

            I've known X and Zero a long time, since before the Repliforce War.  I know that they seldom go looking for trouble, somehow trouble always finds them . . . but they've always managed to walk away from whatever got thrown at them every time, though I still wonder why they could never bring one of my landchasers back in one piece.  I guess we took it for granted that they would always win and always come back home . . . their last battle with Sigma kind of shattered that illusion.  I guess that their luck was bound to run out eventually, I just never thought it would happen in my lifetime.

            We searched that place for two full days and didn't find any sign of X or Zero.  Not one scrap of armor or even a broken circuit board.  We knew that there should have been some sign of their bodies, I mean they survived that big explosion just to get killed by some unknown attacker – I'm certain it was Sigma  – and nothing short of a tactical nuke can completely obliterate a reploid's body . . . so how could there be no trace of them?

            We did find something digging through the debris though . . . something I hadn't seen in person before and hoped to never have to.  We found it in a cavern that branched off from the pit that served as the entrance.  I could tell from the scaffolding and the remains of the various machines that somebody had been building something **big**.  It wasn't too long after entering the cavern that we saw what it was and everyone on the recovery team panicked.

            Sigma . . . we had found Sigma.  Well, more accurately what was left of Sigma's latest battle body . . . that thing was monstrously huge and was probably armed to the teeth with all sorts of nasty little toys.  It had been almost completely blown apart and pieces of it were scattered all over the cavern, but the head and most of the upper torso had survived somehow.  The thing's face looked like a huge death's-head with a gaping mouth and a hole drilled right through the center of its skull.  I can't blame anyone on the recovery team for not wanting to go near that thing . . . nobody wanted to risk being attacked by it or becoming Sigma's new host.  Apparently even in death Sigma is still capable of terrifying us . . .

            I didn't really believe that Sigma was still alive given the state of that body . . . but I called the security team down anyways to make sure that baldy was dead and allay the fears of the recovery team.  The security team consisted of Unit 0 and the 17th – they intended to come along to help search for their missing commanders no matter what, so Signas made them the security detail rather than try to force them to remain at the base.  If Sigma had still been alive, they would have made him wish he wasn't.  Fortunately they confirmed what I suspected, Sigma was dead.  If Alia is right about him spreading the virus too thin during the colony crisis . . . then he's not coming back anytime soon, if ever.  If that's true, then maybe we can actually put an end to this war with the Mavericks.

            We searched that entire cavern and still didn't see hide or hair of X and Zero . . . finally we called it quits and went back to base camp.  That's when we got the biggest shock of our lives.

            X was lying down in the middle of the camp like he was asleep or something!  I know we set up the camp in a hurry, but I'm pretty sure he wasn't there when we arrived.  To make things even more interesting he was completely undamaged!  From transponder readings Alia had gotten before losing X's signal we had expected him to be blown in half, missing a limb, or at least have carbon scoring on his armor . . . but when we found him . . . he was in perfect condition!  There wasn't so much as scratch or smudge on his armor.  What really freaked everyone out was the fact that Zero's Z-saber was on the ground right next to him.

            It was just too weird.  Nobody at the camp had seen him arrive and there was sign of him being teleported there.  When we tried to wake X, he just lay there . . . we could tell he was alive, just not responding.  We radioed the HQ to let them know that we had found X and then did a quick search of the area for Zero in case something similar had happened with him . . . but there was no sign of him other than his saber.

            I brought X back here while the rest of the recovery team kept searching for Zero . . . I probably should have stayed too, but X is so difficult to repair even under the best of circumstances that Lifesavor usually needs me or Alia to help him when he runs into one of  X's "black boxes."  It's a real pain working on those parts of X that nobody can analyze properly . . . then again the fact nobody understands or can precisely duplicate those components is probably why there aren't a whole lot of Mavericks who can rival him in power.  That's a scary thought though, a group of Mavericks as powerful as X or Zero . . . a battle with them would probably wreck the planet worse than the falling debris from the colony.

            As glad as I am that X is back safe and sound . . . having him just mysteriously appear uninjured in the middle of the recovery team base camp creeps me out more than just a little.

            I wonder why X won't wake up . . . There didn't seem to be anything wrong with him when I ran a check on him back at the base camp.  I guess we'll know as soon as Lifesavor does a scan of him and runs some diagnostics.  Maybe calling Alia was premature since X isn't awake and we don't really know what's wrong with him, but it's probably a good idea to have her here and ready in case we do need her help.  Lifesavor doesn't seem to have a problem with calling for her though . . .

            "Doc, do you think we should have waited till we had more info about his condition before calling Alia?"

            "It won't hurt for her to be here on standby if it turns out we do need her assistance.  You said yourself that X didn't appear to have anything physically wrong with him, which means that his current state could be the result of a program error caused by whoever put him back together.  Correcting such a thing would be more Alia's specialty since her programming abilities exceed mine or yours and she may have encountered something similar during her time with the Reploid Research Group.  If that is the case, it will take that much less time to fix X.  Besides, it was your idea to call her."

            Lifesavor has a point.  It was my idea . . .

            "True Doc, but you're the one who said it was a good idea."

            "Because it was a good idea, we may need her help and this will at least get her to stop moping around in her room when she should be getting rest."

            "I wouldn't exactly say Alia's been moping, but she is probably just getting her first real chance to deal with what she thought happened."

            "I know that . . . but I still don't like seeing my patients go through something like this.  I can fix the body of almost any reploid with no problem, but there's usually very little I can do to help them with whatever psychological or emotional problems they have to deal with when they take an event as hard as she took X's supposed death."

            I suppose that's true.  It's easier to heal the body than it is the soul . . . 

            "Alright you two, where's this patient you wanted me to check out?"

            Whatever I was expecting Alia's first words to be when she got here, those weren't them.  I can tell from her tone she's in no mood to play games but at the same time she sounds a little hopeful . . . I think she already knows who it is we found and is just trying to avoid getting her hopes up in case she's wrong.  Alia tries so hard to keep her feelings in check . . . it's a shame really, it may cost her one day if she doesn't just come out and tell people how she feels.  I may as well just go ahead and let her see X.

            "Right over here Alia."

            I wish I had a camera.  The look on her face is priceless; Alia is pretty imperturbable most of the time, so it's rare to see her so surprised.  She may have suspected that we found X when we called her down here, but she probably didn't expect him to be alive and in one piece.  The look of joy in her eyes gives away how relieved and happy she is to see him again . . . I just hope there really is nothing wrong with him and that he wakes up soon.  I don't want to have gotten Alia's hopes up only to have her find out that there's something wrong with X that we can't fix.  All the scans I did at the base camp indicated that he was fully repaired . . . but still there's the possibility that they missed something.

            "Douglas . . . what . . . how . . . how did you manage to repair him so quickly?"

            "We didn't fix him Alia."

            "What do you mean you didn't fix him?  Who else could have?  The readings from his transponder indicated that he took heavy damage.  You couldn't have just found him lying somewhere completely uninjured!"

            "That's actually what happened.  We found him lying practically in the middle of the base camp today.  Nobody knows how he got there either."

            "Nobody knows?  I'm guessing you couldn't get any answers from X then."

            "Yeah, he was asleep when we found him and he hasn't woken up yet . . . we should know more about his condition when Lifesavor finishes his scans of X."

            "Okay, but it doesn't make sense . . . X simply vanishes after being badly hurt and then just reappears looking completely healed.  On top of that no one saw him enter the camp . . . What's going on?  Who could have fixed him?"

            I knew the circumstances of how we found X would drive her nuts.  Alia tries to deal with everything using facts and logic and there is no logical explanation for why we couldn't find X only to have him appear out of nowhere totally unharmed.  I guess somebody could have fixed him . . . but that doesn't explain how that person could have dumped X's body at the camp without being seen.  This is probably one of those things where it's better to simply accept what's happened and not look the gift horse in the mouth.

            "If either of you are interested, I've already completed the scans on X.  He has been completely repaired; in fact, his systems are operating much more efficiently than they have been in the last few years – apparently whoever fixed him gave him something of a tune-up – and there has been no apparent tampering with his programming.  In other words, X is in perfect shape and there's no need for us to do anything but wait for him to wake up."

            "Why isn't he awake now Lifesavor?"

            "Well, Alia . . . his system is running some type of high-level diagnostic that I've never seen before.  I don't know how long it will take, but X should wake up after the diagnostic is complete."

            Well that's a relief.  There's nothing wrong with X . . . but I wonder how he was repaired and who initiated this diagnostic program that's keeping him from waking up.  I'm surprised that Lifesavor's never seen anything like it . . . then again this is X we're talking about, so I guess it shouldn't be too surprising that there's some kind of program we've never seen before floating around in his head.

            Alia looks relieved at the news about X's condition.  I'm glad we didn't need her help after all to repair him and maybe now she'll be able to cheer up some.  Since there's nothing we can do to help him, there's no point in hanging around here.  I guess that means I should return to point 11F5646 and keep looking for Zero . . . maybe we'll luck out again and find him too.

            "Sounds like there's nothing for us to do but wait for X to finish that diagnostic and wake up . . . I guess that means I should get back to work coordinating the recovery teams."

            "If you found X, then maybe Zero will pop up too.  I'll be sure to notify both of you and Signas if there is any change in X's condition."

            "Thank you, Lifesavor . . . is it okay if I stay for a while longer though?  I'm still on break and I won't be needed in the Control Center for a while . . . I could analyze that diagnostic and see if I can't figure out when it will be done."

            "Hmm . . . okay.  It won't hurt for you to keep an eye on X for a while.  Just make sure to get some rest soon, you haven't taken a break since this mess began and it's not wise to overwork yourself like that."

            "Alright, I'll get some rest later.  I promise."

            Finding X is the first good news we've had since the colony blew up.  I imagine that once word spreads about X being recovered a lot of the tension and fear that has settled over the base will start to subside.  Alia already seems to be doing better now.  She's obviously still a little apprehensive over the fact X isn't awake yet, but I suppose that it's an improvement over how she's been these last few days.  

            I feel like our luck is starting to change . . . we may even find Zero soon.  He had to have survived, who else could have put the Z-saber next to X?  If X survived then why couldn't Zero have as well?  I mean he's already come back from the dead once before.  I know we'll find Zero . . . then we can focus on rebuilding the planet.  I'm sure we can handle whatever surprises come our way with X and Zero to help us.  Things are actually starting to look up for once.

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AN:  Well, what did you think?  I apologize if this one isn't as good as my earlier chapters.  Thank you for reading my story.  I still have about three chapters left, so please be patient while I work on them.  Please review, I appreciate your comments.


	7. Alia

AN:  Here is the next chapter of my story.

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**Alia**

            He looks so at peace . . . like he doesn't have a care in the world . . .

            It's been four days since X was found and he's still sleeping.   I haven't been able to decipher the code of the diagnostic program that's keeping him like this, so I have no idea just what it's doing or when it will be finished.  It isn't all that surprising that I couldn't analyze the program, there are still many aspects of X's design that we still don't understand and this program is just another one of them.  I didn't really expect to be able to figure it out anyways . . . it mostly just to gives me an excuse to check on X . . . I wonder if anyone really believes that's the only reason I've been coming to the infirmary every day.  I'm not even fooling myself with that excuse . . . I suppose the real reason has to do with all these feelings that got dredged up when I thought X was dead . . .

            I can't even begin to describe how happy I am that X was found alive . . . I almost couldn't believe it.  Sometimes I'm afraid that this is all a dream, that I'll wake up and find out that he is gone forever . . . I guess that's part of why I come here every day, to reassure myself that this is real, that X really did come back to us.  When Lifesavor and Douglas left me alone with X the day they brought him home, I cried . . . I never knew that person could cry because they were happy before . . . that's the second time X made me cry that day, the jerk.  I'm just glad that he's alive and unharmed; if you don't count the fact he hasn't woken up yet.

            The fact that he isn't awake and that we don't know how he got repaired from the damage he took has been bothering me though.

            I know X's auto-repair system is among the most advanced of any ever developed . . . but I don't think that it could have healed the level of damage that X's transponder readings indicated he sustained.  There's also supposedly nobody around who can understand some of his systems well enough to duplicate them, let alone repair them.  I'm not saying it's impossible to repair those systems, just very difficult and most of the work has to be left to the auto-repair system.  Besides, there were only two days between when we lost X's signal and he was found by Douglas . . . that's hardly enough time for even someone like me or Gate to repair X enough from that kind of damage for his auto-repair system to take over.  The fact that X was fully repaired would indicate that whoever fixed him had extensive knowledge of how he works.   The same goes for this diagnostic program.  If X didn't initiate it himself or if it didn't execute automatically after he was repaired, then the person who fixed him would have to be aware of its existence to activate it.  But the only person with that kind of knowledge would be Dr. Light and he's been dead for over a century.  Some people are proclaiming X's recovery to be some kind of miracle.  While I respond that it's probably just the result of something in X's design and not a miracle . . . I don't have the same conviction in my words that I would have a few days ago.  I really can't think of a more appropriate term to describe X's sudden reappearance . . . 

            I knew if something like this happened, I'd drive myself crazy trying to find an explanation for it.  It frustrates me that I can't figure out exactly how X was repaired and placed at the recovery team's base camp . . . I've always had trouble just accepting that sometimes unexplainable things happen.  Maybe X can answer my questions when he wakes up, unless of course whoever repaired him somehow deleted that information from his memory.

            Could someone really do that?

            Yes, they could . . . that opens up a whole new set of worries.  Reploid memories may just be lines of code, but they are notoriously difficult to alter and it's even harder to try and implant false memories.  Deleting memories is somewhat easier, but still dangerous . . . an incomplete deletion could leave a data fragment that may cause the reploid to recall parts of the lost memory and there's always the risk of deleting other data along with the memory by mistake.  The fact that most reploids keep a backup file of their memories makes messing with them even harder.  If you don't delete or alter the backup, then it could restore whatever memory was tampered with to its original state.  The only way to really ensure that a memory is destroyed is to completely reinitialize a reploid back to the factory state . . . but that not only completely erases every last memory a reploid has, it also deletes the reploid's personality as well.

            Would whoever repaired X have really risked tampering with his memories?  Does that mean X won't remember how he was repaired?  That may not be so bad . . . but if they really messed up, then X may have forgotten more than just that.  He may not even remember me, Signas, or any of the members of his unit depending on just how much of his memory got erased.  They could have even altered his personality somehow . . . X may not even be the same man I remember when he finally wakes up.  That's assuming he does wake up . . .

            No!  He will wake up.  I know that much . . . and despite the worries that the idea of stranger poking around in X's head arouses, I have a strong feeling that I'm worrying for no reason at all . . . that X will be the same person I remember, the same man I . . .

            I'm not sure I want to open that particular can of worms yet.  During this last week I've had to deal with a lot of feelings that I didn't know I had about X . . . or maybe they were feelings I simply chose not to acknowledge because I didn't want to complicate things between us . . . I really value X's friendship and if I admitted to him that I had those kind of feelings for him but he didn't feel the same way, I could risk damaging that friendship.  I don't care what other people seem to think, if you tell somebody that you're in love with them . . . it changes things between you and that person.  How can I really even be sure that I really feel that way about him?  I probably shouldn't tell him until I'm certain of my feelings and at least have some clue how he feels . . . until I figure out what I'm going to do about these feelings, I'll keep doing what I've always done.  I will continue to support X in any way I can and always be there for him.  I'm just glad to have him back . . . I've never felt so overjoyed about something before.  Of course there is a part of me that still wants to yell at him for making me think he was dead and scaring me like that.

            X's return has actually given the morale at the base a real boost.  Everyone seems a little less on edge, even Signas.  He's had it rough lately trying to asses just how many Hunter's we've lost and trying to ensure the safety of the civilians who fled to the underground shelters from Maverick attacks.  On top of that the Council has made it our responsibility to repair the damage done by the colony debris.  Hopefully we'll be able to get the remaining non-Maverick reploids on the surface to assist us in the clean up; I don't know if the Hunters can handle it alone after the recent crisis.

            Other than the prospect of rebuilding the planet, the only other thing that has put a damper on X's return is Zero's absence.  Douglas still hasn't found any sign of him and the recovery teams finally packed up and left point 11F5646 earlier today.  They searched the area several dozen times and worked around the clock the whole time.  The only evidence that Zero was ever at that place was his Z-saber, which somehow wound up with X.  I wonder if Zero survived like X did and we just haven't uncovered him yet.  Someone had to have put the saber next to X . . . could Zero have done it?  If that's the case then why would he just leave X like that?  Is Zero afraid that he's been branded a Maverick because of his disobeying orders or since that new virus had the same readings as him?  I just have trouble believing that Zero wouldn't return to the base if he were able to . . . Zero could be reckless at times, but he always took responsibility for his actions and their consequences.  I don't know why Zero went to point 11F5646, but I don't think he intended to not come back after he was through there.

            It probably wasn't Zero who left the saber with X.  It must have been put there by whoever repaired X . . . that still doesn't explain why there's no sign of Zero's remains.  Maybe Zero is really gone for good . . . I'd hate to have to be the one to tell X if that's true.  Zero was like a brother to him, X would be devastated to learn that he's dead.  What's worse is that since we can't positively confirm Zero's death because there's no body, it will always leave room for the possibility that he's still alive in X's mind and X won't give up on Zero until he finds some proof of whether Zero is alive or not.  Since there are no clues as to what happened to Zero after we lost contact with X, it's impossible to launch any type of effective search for him, other than the type of search the recovery team that found X just completed.  The only thing left of Zero seems to be his saber.

            I have the saber with me right now, lying next to the terminal I'm using.  I convinced Douglas that someone should hold on to it and give it to X – I'm sure Zero would want him to have it.  Douglas decided I should be the one to hold on to it for some reason.  I think it would mean a lot to X for him to have the saber to remember Zero by . . .

            I know Zero had this particular saber custom modified over the years to increase its usefulness.  He upgraded the power cell, boosted the blade's energy output, and modified it so that he could upload the DNA files of opponents into it so that he could use them to develop new saber techniques.  There are other beam sabers with comparable power and abilities out there . . . but none are quite like this one.  Maybe that perception has more to do with the man who owned the saber rather than the weapon itself.

            I wonder when X will wake up . . . Just looking at him you'd never think that he had been hurt severely in a major battle just a week ago . . . 

            "He does look cute when he's asleep though . . ."

            What?!  Did I just say that out loud?  Oh my God, I can't believe I did that!  I hope nobody heard me . . . I'm supposed to be working on an analyses of that diagnostic program, not ogling X or whatever it was I was just doing.  I doubt X heard me; Lifesavor commented earlier that X shouldn't be able to hear anything in his current state.  Not that it's stopped any of the 17th's members from coming in and talking to him . . . they come down here as often as me.  They care a great deal about X.  He's not just their leader, he's a friend and confidant to many of them . . . and to some of them he's something of a father figure.  They know he genuinely cares about him and would not ask any more of them than they are capable of and because of that they give him their all.  The entire 17th would follow X through Hell itself if he asked them to.  A fair number of commanders from the remaining units have stopped by to check on X as well, many of them were at one point under his command or trained by him.  I wonder if X ever realized how important he is to so many people and not just because of his skills as a warrior.

            I wonder what X would think if he could hear his friends talking to him even though he probably wouldn't be able to respond.  I wonder what he would think if he heard what I said a minute ago.  I know X considers me a good friend and he seems to enjoy spending time with me . . . What would he do if he thought I might have feelings for him?  Could he ever view me as anything other than a friend?  If I really do love him, like I'm starting to think I might . . . can I really be content with only being his friend?  Would that be enough for me?  I don't know . . . 

            Why am I even thinking about stuff like that?  I should just be grateful that he's alive.  It'd be foolish to even consider starting a relationship in the middle of war anyways; things are just too uncertain right now.  It'd probably be wiser just to wait till the war is over before I even start thinking like that again.  I mean this war can't go on forever.  Even if X did feel that way about me, I'd probably just wind up being a distraction to him and he can't afford to be distracted in his line of work.  Telling X how I feel would just needlessly complicate things between anyways, especially if he doesn't feel the same way . . .

            I suppose that's what it boils down to . . . I'm still confused about my feelings for him, I don't know if he can ever view me as more than a friend, and I'm too scared to risk the relationship I already have with X to find out how he does feel about me.

            I think it's best for now if I just remain X's friend until I sort out just how I do feel about him.  I need to know for certain whether these feelings I have mean I really am in love with him or not.  Then I can decide what I'm going to do, if I want to take a shot at a deeper relationship with X or just let things stay the way they are.  I shouldn't take too long to figure it out though, if there's one thing I've learned this week it's that X may not be around forever like we always assumed he would be.

            Huh?  Did I just hear a noise?   It sounded like it was coming from X's bed . . . I better check on him.

            Nothing . . . he isn't making any noise other than breathing and he's not moving.  It must have been my imagination . . . he didn't wake up and there's no change in the readouts of the monitors by his bed . . . so why am I still standing here looking at him?

            This is embarrassing . . . what if somebody sees me just hovering over X like this.  Why can't I take my eyes off him?  I feel silly standing here by his bed . . . like I expect him to wake up any second.

            I should probably leave . . . my shift starts in an hour and there are some reports Signas wants me to go over . . . but I can't make myself move.

            "X, please wake up . . ."

            Why'd I say that?  He can't hear me, so it's not like asking him to wake up will accomplish anything . . .

            Wait a minute, his eyes . . . the . . . they're opening!  He's smiling too!

            "Hi Alia, looks like I survived long enough for you guys to rescue me after all . . . Were you able to save Zero too?"

            He's awake, he's really awake . . . he's even sitting up!  What do I do now?  Should I tell him about Zero or should I let someone else do it?

            "X, we . . . we couldn't find Zero.  There was no sign of him anywhere when we found you . . . I'm sorry."

            He looks like someone just hit him in the gut . . . that's not surprising; he just found out that not only that his best friend is dead but that we weren't even able to find his body.  I guess X is feeling more or less the way I did when I thought he was dead . . . but given how close he was to Zero, I'd venture to say he may feel worse than I did.  If that's true, then he's holding a lot of the pain inside, not allowing anybody to see just how much it really hurts.  Human or reploid, it doesn't matter, when something hurts we're often reluctant to let anybody, even our friends, know just how much pain we're really in . . . 

            I can't stand it!  It hurts to see him suffering like this.  I know how X is.  He doesn't like to burden other people with his problems, so he always tries to deal with them by himself.  On top of that he always seems to be trying to shoulder other people's problems and help them out, no matter what problems he's going through himself.  I wish I could do something to help him, to make Zero's loss more bearable . . .

            "After the fight with Sigma, Zero was in really bad shape . . . I knew he might not make it . . . I was just hoping that maybe . . . maybe he did."

            "X . . ."

            "What Alia?"

            Damn it!  Why can't I think of anything to say?  What could I possibly say to comfort him that wouldn't sound cliché or like empty words?  Should I tell him that Zero wouldn't want him to mourn his death?  That wouldn't help things at all.  It'd probably just make X angry with me.  I can't say that I understand how he's feeling, even though I do.  When a person grieves they seldom believe that anyone really understands how they feel and get hostile if you sound like you're trivializing their emotions.  I don't want to make X angry or add to his grief by saying or doing the wrong thing.

            "I'm so sorry X."

            That's all I can think of to say as I put my arms around him.  It's the truth, I am sorry that Zero's gone.  I'm also sorry that X has to experience the pain of losing his best friend.  I just wish there was something I could do for him.

            I don't know if hugging him was the right thing to do . . . but it was all I could think of.  I'm not the most experienced person at helping others cope with grief, so I hope I did the right thing.  I don't want X to blame himself for not being able to save Zero.  I know in my heart that he did everything he could, but sometimes that's not always enough to accomplish an objective.  Sometimes it doesn't matter what we do, some outcomes just can't be avoided . . .

            "I shouldn't have fought him . . ."

            "What?"

            "I found Zero shortly before going after Sigma.  I asked him to come back to the base and let me handle the investigation . . . He wouldn't come back though.  He told me to leave and let him finish up there, but I couldn't.  I couldn't allow him to stay there and keep exposing himself to the virus, I was afraid of what affects it would have on him.  I told Zero that I'd fight him if that was the only way to bring him back.  He didn't believe me.  Neither of us was going to leave or back down and finally . . ."

            "You fought him."

            I can't believe it . . . X and Zero fought each other?!  I wasn't expecting that.  But from the pain in his voice and the look in his eyes, I know he's telling the truth.

            I can tell it's not easy for X to tell me what happened.  I don't know why he is.  He doesn't have to tell me this; he doesn't have to tell anyone about what happened there.  He could have just told everyone that he and Zero fought Sigma and left this part out.  Maybe he needs to talk about it to someone and I just happened to be on hand . . . I won't tell anyone else about this though.  I'll let X decide if what happened between him and Zero should be in the official report . . . it could really damage Zero's reputation and make it look like Lifesavor was right about him if it got out that he fought X after being ordered back to base.  I don't think X would want to do anything that would change how people would remember Zero.  He wouldn't want people remembering Zero as a possible Maverick instead of the hero he proved himself to be time and again.  Even though Zero and X fought, I don't think Zero was the one who shot X.

            "X, what happened after your fight with Zero?"

            "We were both unconscious, but alive.  About the time we started to come around, Sigma decided to show up.  He tried to finish me off but Zero stopped him.  Then Zero chased after Sigma and I went to help him as soon as I could get up.  By the time I found them, Sigma was in a new battle body and Zero was badly hurt."

            "Then you defeated Sigma and somehow he managed one last attack against you two."

            "How . . ."

            "We picked up a big explosion at the coordinates you went to and we managed to reestablish radio contact right before you were attacked.  Your transponder readings changed so drastically, the only explanation was that someone powerful attacked you."

            "I don't know how Sigma still had the strength to attack me like that since he had to be in worse shape than Zero.  I was pretty messed up myself after that attack.  The repair job you guys did on me is amazing."

            Wait, X thinks we repaired him?  Does that mean he doesn't know who really fixed him?  There's only one way to find out . . .

            "X . . . we didn't repair you.  You were already fully healed when the recovery team found you."

            "H, how is that possible?"

            "We were hoping that you could tell us how or who repaired you once you woke up."

            He looks confused about how we could have just found him totally uninjured and it looks like he's trying to remember something.

            "I'm sorry Alia, but I don't know how I was repaired."

            I can see it in his eyes that there's something he's not telling me, but I feel he's telling the truth about not knowing how it happened.  But after everything he's been through I'm not going to press the issue, especially now.  Zero's death is enough for him to deal with without having everyone harass him about how his injuries were healed.

            "That's okay X.  I'm just glad that you're back safe and sound."

            Wait!  I almost forgot.  Where is the saber?  It's over by the console I was using.  Maybe giving it to X will help him cope with Zero's loss.  I know Zero would want X to have it and it would give X something to always remember Zero by.

            "Alia, where are you going?"

            "I'm just getting something I thought you might want to have.  Here, we may not have found Zero, but we found his saber lying next to you.  I, I thought that you might want it and I believe that Zero would definitely have wanted you to keep it if something happened to him."

            X is trembling slightly as he takes the saber from my hands.  He's holding it so gingerly, like he's afraid of breaking it.  He was definitely surprised to see it here.  The look on his face though, I can see just how much this means to him.  That saber is more than just a weapon, it's a part of Zero – one that will always remain by X's side even though Zero himself is no longer here.  X looks like he's about to cry . . .  maybe I should give him some time alone.  I'll let Lifesavor know that X is awake.

            I wish I could know what he was thinking.  Is he taking this as proof of Zero's death?  Does he still have some hope of finding Zero?  I know that X would have wanted to have the saber once he found out it survived; I just hope that I made the right choice giving it to him now.

            "Thank you Alia."

            There's a quiver in his voice that I've never heard before.  I can tell he really is grateful to me for giving him the Z-saber, but he's going through a lot right now.  I mean he almost died, he just found out Zero's dead, and that some mystery person rebuilt him.  I guess I really should go and give him some time to deal with all of that.

            "It's nothing.  I just thought you might want to hold on to it rather than let it get put in the armory and issued to some rookie who might not appreciate it as much."

            "This means a lot to me Alia.  It really does."

            "Like I said, it wasn't any trouble."

            "Yeah, but still . . . thank you for making sure I got it."

            "Your welcome . . . I guess I better be going now.  I'll let Lifesavor know you're awake before I go."

            "Knowing Lifesavor, he rigged the monitors to let him know when I woke up.  You don't have to go if you don't want to . . . but if you have to be somewhere, I understand.  Maybe we can talk again later?"

            My shift doesn't start for another 30 minutes and those reports Signas wants me to go over aren't so important that they can't wait until later . . . besides, maybe X doesn't want to be alone right now . . .

            I wonder if he knows how happy it makes me that he wants me to stay, how it stirs up all these feelings about him that I've been trying to sort out these last few days.  That he said I could stay probably doesn't mean anything, he probably just wants to have a friend around right now.  Maybe I should stay, I'm not really that eager to leave, I just thought he might want some time alone.

            "Actually, I can stay a few a minutes longer, if that's okay."

            "It is.  Thanks Alia, I'm not sure I feel like being alone right now anyways."

            "I don't mind at all X.  Like I said, I'm just glad to have you back."

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AN:  Well, please let me know what you think.  Given what's going on in school right now, it will be a while before I can work on the next chapter.  Thanks for reading!


	8. X

AN:  Here is the latest chapter in my story folks.  This time it's X.  I would also like to thank everyone who has read and reviewed my story since I began writing it.  I really appreciate it.

Disclaimer:   I do not own any of the Megaman characters!!!  Capcom does.

*************************************

**X**

            Zero's gone . . .

            I don't want to accept the possibility, but Alia wouldn't lie to me . . . especially not about something like this.  If she thought there was any chance of Zero still being alive, she'd have said so.  Besides, I saw how badly damaged he was . . . Zero was on the verge of death when I found him, Sigma's attack just sped things up.

            It really hurts to think that Zero is dead.  I still remember how I felt the first time he died, after I beat Vile.  Zero had overloaded his power systems trying to generate a shot strong enough to finish off Vile's ride armor.  He succeeded, but the price he paid was high.  Zero lay on the ground, his body a total wreck and unable to move.  It was almost too much of an effort for him to tell me to continue on and beat Sigma.  I was shocked and confused by his actions.  I couldn't understand why he chose to sacrifice himself just to make sure that I survived.  I guess when he broke out of the holding cell, I expected him to hold Vile off long enough for me to escape the EMP net I was snared in so that the two of us could take down Vile.  I never expected Zero to do what he did, then again neither had Vile.  I hadn't even known him that long and he had just laid down his life to protect me.  I also felt guilty because, to be honest, we hadn't really gotten along very well in the beginning.  

            We weren't as close back then, in fact prior to my joining the Hunters, Zero mostly behaved like a pompous ass the few times I ran into him.  He acted as though dealing with me was a waste of his time, especially since he initially shared the sentiment held by a few reploids that I was an outdated relic whose only useful function was as Cain's errand boy.  Apparently something changed after Vile handed me my butt on a silver platter . . . maybe Zero was impressed that a rookie lasted that long against Vile or maybe he was just so desperate for troops that he couldn't afford to have even a pathetic excuse of a Hunter leave the front lines, whatever the reason, Zero started being nice to me.  Maybe nice isn't the right word, it was more like he accorded me the respect he felt my abilities and actions deserved.  He even trusted me enough to send me out on my own to fight Sigma's top generals.  He still acted like a jerk at times, but somewhere along the line, I came to view him as a friend and even a mentor.  Maybe that's why his death hit me so hard, he was one of the first friends I lost in combat and he wasn't the last . . . 

            I couldn't save Zero then, just like I wasn't able to save him a week ago.  During that first uprising, there was no way for me to contact someone and have them come recover his body, and I couldn't take it with me since I still had to go fight Sigma . . . Leaving Zero's body behind back then was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made and having to abandon him like that pissed me off royally.  That anger fueled me as I fought my way to Sigma and didn't stop until I had finished the job and escaped.  As Sigma's first base exploded and sank into the ocean, I just felt this heaviness settle on my soul as everything that had happened during the war finally caught up with me.  When I was fighting there was no time to think about what was happening.  After the fighting ended, there was too much time to think about Zero's death and the reploids who had died by my own hand.  Most people would think that being the one responsible for turning the tide of the war would be a great feeling; it was to an extent, I did feel proud about stopping Sigma's war, but mostly I was horrified that I had been capable of doing some of the things I did.  I've made no secret of my revulsion towards violence and before the first uprising, I never imagined in a hundred years that I would ever fight, let alone kill, another being for any reason.  I'm not ashamed to say that discovering just what I was capable of doing during a war frightened me, what sane person wouldn't be?  I never knew I had the kind of power that was awakened in me during those battles and seeing what I could do with that power scared me.  

            That's why the prospect of going Maverick makes me worry.  What would happen if I really did go Maverick and wielded my power without the self restraint I normally impose during a fight?  What if Dr. Light's fears were right and I became an unstoppable force of destruction?  What if not even Zero could've stopped me if I had ever gone Maverick?  Those are the fears that haunt me, especially after the Repliforce War . . . we still don't know how many of them were really Mavericks or if any of them were ever really Mavericks, but we still destroyed them.  I know that we eventually found out that Sigma and Magma Dragoon had framed the Repliforce, but many people still think it was just a matter of time before they went Maverick and that even if the majority of them were innocent, that the Hunter's actions were still justified.  Unfortunately it seems like many Hunters are starting to adopt the policy of shooting first without getting all the facts about a situation, that's how Shield Sheldon wound up getting killed.  The scientist he was in charge of protecting went Maverick and Sheldon didn't realize it.  The Hunters who arrived on the scene assumed that Sheldon was a Maverick as well, guilt by association.  Even Zero, who is perhaps the most gung-ho about fighting anyone who presents themselves as an enemy, was starting to be bothered by that kind of attitude.  I fear that answering most situations with a show of force may eventually turn the Hunters into something they weren't meant to be . . . 

            After the first uprising ended, I eventually came to accept that I did what was necessary to stop a horror of unimaginable proportions from being committed.  I still hold that belief to this day and it has helped me to cope with what I've had to do during the war, to an extent.  Still, I've always wondered if the deaths of all those people and reploids had really been necessary.  I also wonder what I could have done differently to prevent all of that.  Those questions still haunt me to this day . . .

            I didn't get much time to mourn Zero's death back then before I was installed as the new leader of the Maverick Hunters, or the 'Head Hunter' as we used to call the position, and had to go off and fight the remaining Mavericks.  I also received a message from Sigma shortly before taking command of the Hunters, saying that he would return in an even stronger form.  To be honest, that message really creeped me out . . . I was hoping it was a fake, just someone's idea of a bad joke.  I never imagined that I really would face him again in a matter of months or the surprise he had planned for me.

            Initially, the second uprising was little more than a continuation of the mop-up operations the Hunters had been doing for the past several months following Sigma's defeat.  The Mavericks were scattered, disorganized, and incapable of any coordinated efforts.  On top of that, several of the Mavericks were jockeying to become the new Maverick leader.  Then things changed and the Mavericks once again behaved as a unified force.  I figured that they had gotten a new leader; I just never thought it would actually be Sigma.  That fact was almost as much of a shock as the secret agenda that Sigma and the X Hunters seemed to be using the latest uprising as a cover for . . . bringing Zero back to life.

            Having Zero come back from the dead was one of the biggest surprises of the second uprising – though it wasn't as much of a shock as encountering the physical manifestation of Sigma's viral form for the first time, it made me think I was going crazy.  When I learned that the X Hunters had Zero's body and planned on turning him against us, I vowed to do what I had to in order to prevent that from happening.  Fortunately those X Hunters were more talk than anything else and I got all of Zero's parts before they could try to revive him as a Maverick.  It took Dr. Cain awhile, but he repaired Zero after I retrieved all of the parts.  It was great to have Zero back to help us fight the Mavericks again and with the new modifications made to him, he was stronger than before.  Zero was actually pretty impressed with how I had turned out, though he insisted I still had a lot to learn about being a Hunter.  After the second uprising was over, that was when we really started to become best friends.

            It was wonderful to have Zero back.  It's one of the few times I've had a friend be revived after they ceased functioning.  I couldn't stop grinning like a goofy kid when Zero showed up to help me at Sigma's second stronghold.  I know that in some cases when a reploid is revived, it's like they aren't the same person.  They are normally missing some or most of their memories and their personalities are sometimes different.  I guess that's what made Zero's return such a wonderful thing, he hadn't lost his memories and he seemed to be the same person I remembered, but for awhile there were a few people who thought he was little more than a copy of the real Zero.

            Shortly after the fall of the X Hunters, I stepped down from the position of Supreme Commander and assumed control of the 17th Unit while Zero formed a new _shinobi_ style unit, Unit 0.  I gave up the Supreme Commander position for a few reasons.  First, I didn't feel that I had the knowledge or skill to run the Hunters once things went back to normal.  Sure, I did a good job of banding together the remaining Hunters and leading them against the Mavericks . . . but to be truthful, all I had to do then was fight the Mavericks.  I didn't have to deal with the politicians trying to interfere with how I carried out my campaigns and typically we used guerrilla tactics because of our limited numbers, avoiding direct assaults unless we stood a good chance of coming out on top.  I can deal with politicians, but not on the almost everyday basis a Supreme Commander has to.  Playing the political game well is essential to making sure that things run smoothly between the government and the Hunters and to insure that the Hunters get the resources they need – truthfully, I don't quite have the tolerance for politics that Dr. Cain and Signas seem to have.  Secondly, the Council felt that someone with a bit more command experience should be running an organization like the Hunters – given my lack of experience with large-scale, coordinated offensives and running a military outfit as large as they wanted the Hunters to become, I understand why they felt that way.  That and they felt more comfortable with a human in charge of the Hunters.  The third reason was that being the SC meant that if Sigma launched another offensive, I'd be stuck behind a desk instead of hunting baldy down and stopping him.  Not to sound arrogant or anything, but I am one of only two people who really stand a chance against Sigma in combat.  If I was stuck behind at HQ the whole time because of my position, that would only leave Zero to fight and if something happened to him . . . things would go from bad to worse very quickly.  Besides, I was more comfortable being a unit commander, there's just something about it that appeals to me . . . anyways stepping down as the SC didn't bother me, I honestly didn't want the job – of course that's why some people thought I was perfect for it.

            By the time Doppler started his rebellion, Zero and I had become the best of friends and often worked together, despite the fact we were in charge of different units.  Even though I trashed the Maverick generals and both of Sigma's battle bodies, Zero still wound up having to save me twice.  The first time was when Mac led me into a trap; I still can't believe I just walked into it like that!  Then again I wasn't expecting to be betrayed by a fellow Hunter.  The second time was when Sigma's viral form had me trapped and he was about to use me for his new host body.  Zero had gotten his hands on Doppler's antivirus program and then used it to stop Sigma.  I thought for certain that Sigma was finished after that . . . unfortunately he kept coming back, like a cockroach.

            There was a little tension between us when Iris showed up.  We both had feelings for her, but she only had eyes for Zero . . . so I backed off to let them be together.  Iris regarded me as something of a surrogate brother while she stayed with the Hunters, a fact that really irked Colonel to no end.  I suppose it didn't help matters that he felt I had no business being on the battlefield because of my pacifistic views and that I was one of the strongest warriors around.  He could never understand how a person opposed to fighting could be a great warrior.  Colonel found something of kindred spirit in Zero though, they hit it off great.

            The roughest spot in our friendship was after the Repliforce War.  I know Iris's death hit both of us hard, but Zero took it much worse than I did . . . we even had him on a suicide watch at one point, but it also seemed like there was something else bothering him as well.  Something he wouldn't talk about to anybody, not even me or Dr. Cain.  Most of the time he would behave normally, but occasionally it felt like he was trying to put some distance between himself and the rest of the Hunters.  I just associated what he was doing with the reaction of somebody who normally keeps people at a distance and then allowed someone to get close, only to lose that person.  In cases like that, a person normally tries to isolate themselves so they don't risk experiencing the pain of loss again.  Eventually Zero seemed to snap out of it and go back to the way he used to be.  But when Sigma spread the virus all over the planet, Zero began to start acting distant again . . . that's why I think that something else happened during the battle on the Final Weapon that only added to the depression and guilt he felt over Iris's death . . . something that drove him to risk going into the largest concentration of the Zero virus on the planet for some reason.  I wish he had told me what was bothering him or why he felt the need to investigate the Zero virus himself, I might have been able to help him.  Then there would have been no reason to fight . . . and Zero would probably still be alive right now . . .

            It still frustrates me that after all of those times Zero saved me or helped me, that I couldn't do the same for him this time around.

            Even if it is unlikely, I actually kind of expect Zero to make a return like he did before.  But right now I must deal with reality; Zero is most likely dead for good this time . . . I miss him already.

            I'm glad Alia stayed until Lifesaver came.  If she had gone and left me alone to think about what happened to Zero, I would have been a wreck when he showed up.  Lifesaver probably would have wound up suggesting that I see a shrink of something if he had found me like that, especially if I had been crying.  I personally don't see anything wrong with crying, sometimes there's no other way for a person to express their grief over something, but for some reason there are people who view it as a sign of weakness or that a person is starting to lose it.  Naturally nobody wants to see any signs of weakness in one of their heroes and like it or not, that's what many people view me as . . . some hero I turned out to be, the planet's trashed and I couldn't even save my best friend's life . . .

            I'm glad that Alia gave me Zero's saber.  It actually makes it easier to deal with what's happened in a way.  Zero had this saber ever since the second uprising.  This weapon was so important to him that it feels as though he is still here and ready to fight alongside me whenever I hold it.  There is an old Samurai tradition about the sword being the soul of a warrior, so I guess the Z-saber could be considered a part of Zero's soul.  For Zero, that concept seems fitting in a way.  Maybe that's why it feels like he's still here.

            Zero, why did you have to die?  Why couldn't whoever repaired me have also saved you as well?  A lot happened before our most recent fight with Sigma and we wound up at each other's throats briefly.  I wish things hadn't turned out that way, but I can't change what's been done nor can I bring you back, just like I can't bring back Storm Eagle, Squid Adler, Izzy Glow, or Skiver.  The only thing I can do for you now is to carry your memory in my heart and continue fighting until Sigma is no longer a threat . . . I guess that means I'll be fighting for a long time.  Alia believes that Sigma wasted too much of the virus and can't revive himself.  I wish I could believe that, but I've let my guard down too many times before by letting myself believe that each fight with Sigma was the last.  Maybe she's right though . . . if that's true, then maybe it won't take as long to restore peace, but somehow I doubt that we've seen the last of the virus or its victims.

            Why do so many good people have to wind up dead because of that damned virus?  How come after everything I've been through and all the Mavericks I've had to kill, nothing has really been accomplished?  We still have the virus, Sigma always comes back, many people still look at reploids with fear and hatred, and now the Earth is in ruins.  Other than delaying Sigma's goal of destroying humanity, what have I actually accomplished by choosing to fight?  The peaceful world I wanted to create still seems like a distant pipe dream and it's not like reploids are much better off than they were after the end of the second uprising, some might argue that they're worse off.  On top of that my best friend, the closest thing I have to family, may very well be dead.  But I have this strange feeling that I haven't seen the last of Zero.  As much as I would love to see Zero alive and well, for some odd reason there's a part of me that wonders if that would really be such a good thing.

            That's foolish, what would I have to fear from Zero?  I'm just letting all that nonsense Sigma was babbling about get to me.  Old baldy loves to play mind games and there's nothing better that Sigma would have liked than to have me doubt whether I could trust Zero or not.  Even though Zero and I fought each other, I know I can trust Zero.  I didn't go after Zero because I didn't trust him; I went after him because I was worried about what the virus might have been doing to him.  I was afraid that if he continued exposing himself to the virus, he wouldn't be Zero anymore . . . that he'd become something else . . . maybe even something worse than Sigma.

            Zero, if you aren't coming back this time, I'm going to miss you and I hope that you are reunited with Iris.  I know how much you missed her and how much you loved her, even if you wouldn't admit it.  I really wish things had worked out better for the two of you.  I'll try and keep things from falling apart, but losing you again feels like someone just knocked my legs out from under me.  A part of me wants to grieve and another part of me wants Sigma to come back just so I can beat his face in for killing you.  I don't know what I'm going to do without you here to back me up, but I guess I'll get by.  I promise that I'll do everything I can to restore this world and put an end to this war once and for all.

            I can't wait to get out of here.  Not that I have anything against Lifesaver or hospitals, I just don't like being cooped up in the infirmary.  It reminds me too much of those early days after my activation when it seemed like every scientist on the planet wanted to take me apart, scan me, or jam probes in every part of my body to figure out how I worked.  I suppose it's something of an irony that I considered becoming a scientist, given how most of my early experiences with scientists were . . . somewhat less than pleasant.  What am I saying?  Other than Dr. Cain and a few others, most of them just viewed me as an interesting science experiment, not a person or even as a sentient being.  Although I did hit it off pretty well with one particular scientist . . . of course then again Alia's first impulse when she met me wasn't to start bombarding me with questions I couldn't answer about how my systems work.

            In a way, I'm glad she was the one to tell me.  For some reason I have a feeling she honestly understands what I'm going through.  It was kind of surprising to wake up and see her standing next to my bed, though I must admit that waking up to her face is much more pleasant than having the first thing I see be Lifesaver's face.  Lifesaver said that she'd been coming by the infirmary everyday since I was found to check on me.  He also said that she took it pretty hard when it looked like I was dead . . . I know she worries about me when I'm on a mission sometimes, but she usually tries to hide that fact.  I guess she doesn't want me to feel bad about making her worry or do anything else that might distract me from my missions.  It's not like I mean to scare her like that or anything, but there's nothing I can really do about it.  Sometimes to accomplish the mission, you have to take risks, even if it puts your life in danger.  Still, I wish that my supposed death hadn't caused her as much pain as it sounds like it did, though it's touching to know that somebody cares about me that much.

            I hate making her worry about me; I wonder why she worries about me so much anyways . . . most people just believe I'll make it through no matter what and don't get too worked up when I lose contact with base briefly or am in serious danger.  But even though she tries to hide the fact, it's not too hard to tell when Alia is concerned about my safety.  As much as I hate making her worry, I actually do appreciate that she gets concerned over my well being.  I suppose she may worry so much because I'm her friend, but she's spotted for other people who are her friends without getting as anxious as she seems to get over me.  Maybe she just feels responsible for keeping me safe because I'm one of the best Hunters we have . . . no, from the way I've heard her sound when I return from a mission, get into some kind of trouble, and especially when I was dying . . . there was always something in her voice that didn't sound like she was only doing her job.

            Alia and I have been friends for a few years now, pretty good friends actually.  Whether it's just hanging out together, playing chess, or when she somehow manages to clean me out in a game of poker, we've always had a good time being around one another.  I wouldn't go as far as to say that I'm as close to her as I am, err was to Zero – which makes sense simply because I've known Zero for much longer and he's been a mentor, best friend, comrade in arms, and even something of a big brother figure to me over the years – but I do consider her a close friend.  

            I remember when I first met Alia.  She was a kind person, smart, beautiful, and she had this inner strength that allowed her to keep her head even when everything around her was falling apart.  Alia had an air of confidence about her that hinted at her being every bit as skilled as she thought she was and erased any fears you may have had about her fouling up at a critical moment.  Despite the confidence she displayed while on the job, she could be surprisingly shy around people at times.  It also amazed me at how good Alia was at suppressing or concealing her feelings.  But once you got to know her, she loosens up and becomes someone you enjoyed having around.  Except of course when you manage to get her mad . . . when she loses her temper the person on the receiving end usually wishes they were fighting Sigma instead. 

            I initially didn't like the idea of her being assigned to the 17th as its spotter based on her high test scores since she didn't have any real experience doing the job.  It was nothing against her personally . . . I just would have felt better if she had been a spotter for a at least a year or two before being assigned to my unit just so that I could be certain that she could handle it.  Then a group of reploids attacked a factory and took the workers hostage.  Alia did an excellent job of spotting for us, remaining calm and focused the whole time; she even managed to hack into the factory's security system, letting us get by it without tripping any alarms or defenses.  She even used the security cameras to provide us with information about where the terrorists were and where the hostages were being held.  Alia proved to us that day that she could cut it as the 17th Unit's spotter.

            It wasn't too long after that mission that we started to become good friends.  We had discussions about all sorts of things, the war, politics, science, books, movies, and even our personal lives.  I grew to enjoy just having her around, even if all we wound up doing was watching TV together.  I began to look forward to our chess matches and when we'd play poker against the rest of the unit, I didn't even mind it when I lost to her.  Alia became someone I could confide in about my doubts, fears, and hopes . . . she's one of the few people besides Zero I've felt comfortable admitting those things to.  She never seemed to think them to be very childish, stupid, or unrealistic – I know for a fact she would have told me if she had, Alia has never been one to hold back her opinion on something she feels strongly about or if she thinks you're asking her for one.  Alia did think that some of my fears were unfounded and that maybe I tend to be a bit optimistic on my hopes, but she generally seemed to understand them.

            The one memory of her that always comes to mind though is the day she gave me the Fourth Armor.  It was only a copy of my Force Armor, but it meant a lot to me.  Even though I suspect that the Dr. Light hologram is some type of AI and not just a prerecorded message, whenever I get an armor from it – it always feels like the hologram only gives it too me because there was a need for the armor.  When I was given the Fourth Armor . . . it felt more like a gift from somebody who was more concerned about my safety and helping me in any way they could.  Getting the armor from a friend just seemed more meaningful than getting it from a capsule.  I was amazed at how closely she came to making it a perfect copy of the Force Armor, even Dr. Cain hadn't been able to understand the first armor I got from the Light hologram enough to fix it after my first run-in with Sigma.  When Sigma ambushed me at the statue just before the virus was released, I probably would have died or been more seriously damaged if I hadn't been using the armor Alia made me.  Even though the armor was destroyed, it saved my life . . . I guess you could almost say Alia saved my life that day.

            Even though I haven't known her as long as some of my friends, in some ways Alia understands and knows me almost as well as Zero does, I mean did.  She can sometimes even pick up on what I'm thinking or what I'm about to do without me having to say anything.  Alia is also one of the few people who even try to cheer me up when I occasionally fall into a foul mood after missions where the Mavericks did something especially horrific – despite the fact I'm not very pleasant to be around because I tend to be a little short tempered when I'm in a bad mood.  I do appreciate her efforts at cheering me up though, Zero was about the only other person who ever tried – he would at least listen to me when one when one of my depressions hit, that's more than most people are usually willing to do.  Alia also seems to genuinely understand how I feel about fighting and why.  Zero always knew how I felt about fighting, but despite his best efforts he couldn't grasp why I felt like that.  While Zero would often share my sentiments about the atrocities the Mavericks would commit, he couldn't understand why I would feel remorse over killing my enemy.  I do think Zero at least understood why I would choose to be a Hunter even though I despise violence so much.  

            When I explain why I chose to fight to most people, they usually just kind of look at me funny or seem surprised.  I guess the way I explain it, it does sound a little silly – I just tell them that it was the right thing to do.  As much as I hate violence, everything I knew about right and wrong, good and evil, everything I believed in said that Sigma's actions were wrong and that it was an even greater crime to stand by and do nothing.  Despite my pacifistic nature, fighting Sigma made perfect sense to me and I believed with every fiber of my being that I was making the right choice; I still feel it was the right decision despite all the hardships I've endured since then.

            Even though I believe that fighting the Mavericks is the right thing to do and probably the only way to achieve peace . . . that's not the only reason I chose to fight.  It was the main reason, but I also chose to fight because I felt responsible for the war.  I helped Dr. Cain develop the first reploids; I even assisted him in constructing Sigma.  I felt responsible for what Sigma did when he rebelled, responsible for every reploid that went Maverick.  I wondered if there was something I overlooked design-wise back when I assisted Cain that could have prevented so many reploids from going Maverick.  I suppose feeling guilty about the actions of the reploids that went maverick is silly.  Most of them only became that way because of the virus, rarely has a reploid chosen to go Maverick – even with the ones that did choose the life of a Maverick, what could I have honestly done to keep them from making that choice?  Even if I had refused to help Cain develop the first reploid, it wouldn't have stopped reploids from existing.   Sure it may have delayed their creation by several months, maybe a year . . . with Dr. Light's notes, it's not like Dr. Cain really needed my help anyways.  Not to mention there was no way anyone could have predicted the existence of something like the Maverick virus . . .

            Still, I never gave any thought to the kind of life that reploids would live when I decided to help Dr. Cain make them.  I never considered that in some cases they would be viewed as little more than tools or property, and not treated as sentient beings.  I never considered how they would be treated or that those conditions could lead to groups like the Mavericks coming into existence . . . I made a decision to help create the first reploid because I didn't want to be alone anymore.  

            While I did make friends with Dr. Cain and a few other humans, I felt like something of an outsider among them.  In all truth, I didn't fit in anywhere.  The robots at that time were not advanced enough to do anything beyond what they were programmed to, that didn't make them much in terms of company.  There was just too much difference between how I thought and acted and how those old robots did for me to ever really feel any type of connection with them, or for me to view myself as one of them.  I didn't exactly find acceptance among humans either.  I could think like a human, feel the same emotions as a human, but I wasn't viewed as anything more than just a robot by most humans, particularly the scientists.  As the only truly sentient robot on the planet, I was regarded as either a marvel of technology or a scientific curiosity.  Then there were those groups of people who hated me outright because I was a sentient robot.  They felt I was the biggest threat to humanity to ever exist and wanted to make sure that I didn't forget my place as a 'mere machine'.  Even today the attitude exists that reploids are machines meant solely to serve humans, despite the fact reploids have free will and emotions.  Because of the people who were afraid of me and the fact that I was considered too valuable to risk by being allowed to go wherever I wanted, I spent most of my life isolated from the rest of the world at Cain's lab.  Even when I was finally allowed to go out into the world, no matter how well I blended in among the humans – something would always happen to remind me that I wasn't one of them regardless of how well I could fit in and that I probably would never be viewed as anything more than an interesting contraption.

            That's why I devoted myself to helping Cain with his research into how to build a reploid.  That way I wouldn't be the only sentient machine anymore.  There would be others like me who I could talk to, hang out with, who could understand what it's like to be a free thinking robot in a world of humans.  I also naively thought that if there were others like me, then humans would more readily accept me and the reploids as sentient beings and eventually treat us as equals.  In the end, I didn't want to be the only true android . . . but even more than that, I didn't want to feel alone anymore.  It's enough of a burden to be the last creation of a scientific genius and having to live in the shadows of heroes like Megaman and Protoman, with everyone expecting great things of me based on what they know of people I've never even met or don't know anything about, without the feelings of loneliness that I had back then.  (I've always wondered what Protoman and Megaman would think of me . . . if I measure up to their standards or if they could have handled a situation better than I did . . .)  

            This is about the point where Zero would tell me to shut up and stop feeling sorry for myself . . . he always thought it was foolish to waste time on what might-have-been or dwelling too much on the past.  I've always tried to make the best decisions I could, especially during a mission, but sometimes I can't help but wonder if I could have done anything different to get a better outcome.  More often than not it causes me to beat myself up over things I couldn't control or if I tried hard enough to find the best solution to a situation . . . that's usually when I need a friend like Zero to come along and snap me out of it.  It's not always easy to accept that you did the best you could . . . but after awhile I come to accept that fact after every mission, after each time I have to take out a Maverick . . . I just make the best choices I can and hope everything works out.

            That means that I have to accept that I did everything I could a week ago to stop Sigma . . . even though my best friend apparently died in the process . . .

            I'm going to miss you Zero.  You were my closest friend and one of the few people I could always count on.  

            But, why do I have this nagging feeling that you aren't gone just yet Zero?  It's funny, the longer I have your saber, the more certain I am that you are still alive.  It's probably wishful thinking.  Zero, wherever you are, if you can here me . . . just promise me that you'll lend me your strength when I wield this saber.  If Sigma's most recent attack is any indication, darker days are ahead and I'm feeling daunted by them, knowing that I may be facing them alone.  You'll probably think this is silly, but it feels like you're still here when I hold this weapon and it fills me with the confidence to face anything . . .

            It's odd . . . I was so resigned to dieing just a week ago, I felt as though I could die peacefully with no regrets . . . except for one feeling that I couldn't pin down . . . it had to do with saying or doing something.  It was probably nothing.  I was ready to die, so why does the fact I survived bother me?  Probably because it means I have to face life again.  

            During battle, I can face death without flinching and risk my life for others without a second thought.  It's the periods of peace that are often harder for me to deal with than the times of war.  When there's a war on, I know what my purpose and goal is . . . when peace comes, there are times where I feel lost and adrift.  Peace is what I strive for, but I don't often give a lot of thought as to what I would do if the peace lasted forever and the Hunters were no longer needed.  What would I do?  Where would I go?  Would I ever see any of my friends again?  The uncertainty of those prospects can make facing life seem more daunting than embracing death.  With death, there's finality to the things of this life, though it marks the beginning of what lies beyond.  To some people it may seem foolish for a reploid to believe in God and an afterlife, but I do.  I can't think of any reason why I shouldn't and it's nice to know that universe isn't just a random occurrence, that there really is a plan and purpose to it all, even if we can't see it at the time.

            I wish I knew how I survived though.  I keep getting the feeling that I know what happened, but the memory always remains out of reach.

            Perhaps the hardest thing about surviving so far was realizing just how much pain my death would have caused those close to me . . . especially Alia.

            Why did she take it so much harder than the others?  Why do I feel so horrible for putting her through that experience?  Why did seeing the joy on her face when I woke up make me feel so . . . happy?

            This is frustrating.  Lately I've been wondering just what my feelings for Alia are.  I know she's my friend, but some of the thoughts and feelings I've been having about her are confusing . . . they aren't bad or anything – I'm just not sure what to think of them.  Sometimes I'll catch myself looking at her, thinking how pretty she looks, or for no real reason I start thinking about her . . . the way her eyes sparkle when she laughs, how much I enjoy being around her, how much I look forward to spending time with her . . . the way she smiles when beats me in an argument, at chess, or when I return home safely . . .  Whenever I see her lately, this strange warm feeling appears.  It's like it starts in my chest and then spreads from there . . . I also remember the feeling of relief that swept over me when I found out that she hadn't been infected by the virus when Sigma spread it all over the globe.

            Alia's my friend and I would never do anything to jeopardize that.  But the way I feel about her at times is really confusing.  Is it just a phase?  One of those rare times where for a while you view somebody close to you in a different light, or is it possible I have feelings for her that . . .

            No.  Stop right there.  That's not something that I can allow to happen or even let myself think about.  If I allow myself to even think of her in that way, then I risk the possibility of actually falling in love with her.  We're in the middle of a war and things are bound to get worse before they get better . . . it'd be foolish to form that kind of attachment to anyone right now.  It wouldn't be fair to do that to a person I care about since they would worry about me during missions, they'd probably become targets for the Mavericks because of that relationship, and if something happened to me - I'd hate to put somebody I loved through that kind of pain.  Besides, being in a relationship would probably just distract me from my duties.  That's something I can't afford right now since Zero is gone – everyone's counting on me now.

            But Alia already worries about me and she took my "death" pretty hard . . . I still remember the happy expression on her face once she overcame her initial shock of my reawakening . . . No!  I can't allow myself to see her as anything more than a friend.  Even _if_ I did feel that way about her, until the Mavericks are stopped, I am a war machine . . . and she deserves better than someone whose existence revolves around killing.  Whatever feelings she ahs towards me are little more than concern for the well-being of a friend - feelings that are usually hidden behind the professional façade she presents to everyone but those close to her.  Sometimes it makes me wonder if she's had trouble making friends in the past and is afraid of losing the ones she has now . . . actually, I don't really know anything about what she did before becoming a Hunter.  

            I know she was a part of the Reploid Research Team, but that's it.  Whenever I've asked she's always changed the subject, just gave me vague answers, or side-step the issue by saying something like "What I did was just a bunch of boring scientific stuff, nothing really worth mentioning."  I know she's not telling me something, but I never pressed the issue because she got real nervous about the subject and would clam up.  It was like she was scared of something . . . I'm sure she'll tell me whenever she's finally ready to talk about it though.  It's probably nothing to get worried about . . .

            Even though I'm not sure what these feelings I'm experiencing mean, I won't let them affect my friendship with Alia.  She worries enough about me as it is, the last thing I need to do is to tell her about these feelings.  Not only would it alter the nature of our friendship – even if it turns out I don't really feel _that way about her – but it would also just cause her to be more concerned about me.  That's why I can't get into a relationship, I hate causing someone that degree of anxiety over me – the nature of my work guarantees that anyone I could get involved with would become a nervous wreck over the dangers I face.  Besides it would be awful if I made her think that I loved her and she really did feel that way only for me to later realize I misinterpreted my feelings for her . . . it would be just as bad if I really do feel that way and she flat out rejected me . . . besides she deserves better than a soldier who would have to run off at a moments notice to face incomprehensible dangers and is almost always trying to deal with his own doubts and occasional depression; she deserves someone who can always be there for her and isn't carrying that kind of baggage.  Who knows?  Maybe if the war had never happened and . . ._

            No, I'm not going to start doing those what-if scenarios.  I need to get out of here and back to work.  This is why I hate being in the infirmary most of all.  It gives me too much time to think about everything going on in my life.  I need to get back to my unit; maybe doing my duties will get my mind off of Alia.  It's hard enough to lose your best friend, but then to have to deal with feelings that could jeopardize your relationship with another one of your friends as well . . . 

            As confusing as these feelings I've been having about Alia are, I'm not going to act on them or even mention them to her – not unless I'm absolutely certain they're genuine and aren't just a reaction to suddenly being reminded of my own mortality and losing Zero.

            I wish I could ask Zero for advice about this.  He'd probably agree that it's just nothing but a phase I'm going through.  Then again Zero would probably take this as an opportunity to tease me . . . he always seemed to get this funny look in his eye when he saw Alia and me together.

            Dammit bro, I miss you.  I know that you must have died from Sigma's attack, an attack meant to kill me, but I still don't want to accept it.  I mean we both survived so many life-threatening situations over the years that even I fell prey to thinking that there was nothing that could stop either one of us.  I let myself start to believe the myth that we were unstoppable only to get one of the rudest awakenings imaginable . . . I should have known better than to start thinking that way.  Every time I've been in a tight spot and was looking the grim reaper in the eye, something has always happened to give me a way out . . . to elude death.

            What happened back there?  I should be dead.  Why can't I remember?  I'm sure I know what happened, but I can't recall anything after I began to slip away . . .

            I wonder how much longer Lifesavor wants me to stay here . . . speak of the devil.

            "How are you doing X?"

            "I'm feeling fine doc."

            "Good, good.  We finished going over the diagnostic scans, there's no sign of any remaining damage to your systems and there's no trace of either the Sigma or Zero virus.  Congratulations, you've made a full recovery."

            "So I'm free to go?"

            "Yes, but I want you to get at least twenty-four hours of rest before going back on active duty.  You've been through a lot lately, so you could probably use the break."

            I've been through a lot?  That's something of an understatement.  I think that events of the whole disaster involving the Eurasia colony fall into a bigger category than just 'a lot'.

            "Thanks Lifesavor.  I'll be sure to rest up."

            "I mean it X.  I know you have a tendency to push yourself harder than you should at times, even when recovering from heavy damage.  Just take it easy for now, it's not like the world is going to – I mean the way things are right now, the rest of the Hunters can hold it together long enough for you to take a day off."

            I know what he was going to say.  He was going to say that it's not like the world would end if I took a day off.  Bad choice of words given what happened to the planet recently.

            "Okay doc.  I promise to rest.  See you later."

            So I have a day off – a whole day to mull over everything that's happened involving the Colony crisis, Zero, these feelings for Alia, and to figure out my role for the coming days.  Like it or not, I am now the only Hunter left that's capable of dealing with the more powerful Mavericks.  At least one thing is clear; no matter what, I will continue to protect the reploids and humans of this world from the Mavericks with every last ounce of strength and resolve I have to offer.   I will help rebuild this world.  I will not let my dream of a peaceful world die nor will I let those who have sacrificed their lives to achieve that goal have done so in vain.  I'll keep on fighting till the Mavericks are a distant memory and peace is restored.

            Until that day comes, I won't give up.

********************************

AN:  There it is.  I was kind of thinking of making this my last chapter for the story since the X5 ending skips three years ahead after this point and really does little more than express X's resolve to fight even though Zero is gone and I think this kind of leads into X6 better.

Anyways, please read and review and let me know what you think!


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